Page 386 of Conveniently Wed
At every turn, she offered to do jobs that took her as far away from the family as possible. At least when she was alone, she could wipe the pasted happy off her face. The barn was the perfect hideaway. She fed and watered the chickens, hauling water from the nearby pump. Then she raked fresh straw around the stall that belonged to the scrawny bay gelding. Thankfully, he was out in the pasture, being the ornery suspicious type. Would Uncle John ever be able to bring him back to a place of trust? The gelding and she had a lot in common.
Pecking at the ground with the rake like a lost chicken looking for its next meal, Katie’s mind raced. Only a week until the wedding. Her body broke out in a cold sweat just thinking about it. But who could she confide in? She’d always found it easy to talk to Pa, but this was different. If she spoke the truth, it would steal his joy. And Ma hadn’t looked this happy in years. On more than one occasion, she’d given Katie an awkward hug. It had been so long since Katie had experienced that kind of warmth, it served to heighten the deep ache of loneliness.
“God, if you’re really in this world like Aunt May believes, why do I feel so alone?” Katie murmured into the dusty rafters of the old barn. As if on cue, the moment she said those words, a shaft of light streamed through a crack in the weathered roof and encircled her. Had the sun peeked out from behind a cloud the moment she prayed? She looked up at the dancing particles of dust that shimmered gold. An odd sensation of warmth enveloped her, like the presence of more was in the barn.
“There you are, sis. Can we go for a walk?” Amelia stood in the doorway.
Katie pulled herself from the quiet moment. “Help me finish gathering the eggs. I kinda got sidetracked. Let’s see who can find the most.”
“You’re on,” Amelia said. “Probably be the last time we…” She cut off her words, but tears shimmered in her kind eyes.
“No, you don’t, Amelia. Because if you start, I’ll start. Let’s get the eggs. Ready. Set. Go.” Katie threw herself into the task and marveled at the difference between herself and her sister. Amelia was a gentle soul, ladylike, and cautious. Katie was the direct opposite—impulsive, daring, and adventurous.
In a crowd, Amelia was often overlooked. Her straight brown hair, brown eyes, and pudgy frame with rosy round cheeks blended into the background. She was sturdy and strong, a mirror image of their ma.
From the time Katie was a child, people had oohed and awed about her unusual eye color, her porcelain skin, and her beautiful wavy hair. The remarks had always annoyed Ma. Then, when the curves came and boys buzzed around like bees to honey, Ma insisted she bind up her chest so tightly it hurt, wear dresses one size too big, and keep her hair in a tight bun. Oh, how she had longed to be a boy and have the freedom of her brothers, for she was far more comfortable in a saddle and britches than in the kitchen.
“Done,” her sister yelled. “Who cares who got the most? Let’s get out into that sunshine.”
Katie laughed. “See, that’s the difference between us. I was already counting my basket.”
Amelia waved her hand. “I’ll run the eggs in, and then we’ll make our great escape.”
Katie waited for her return, and they giggled like they were ten again as they lit out running for the nearby copse of trees. Once safely out of view, they slowed and drew in deep breaths. How desperately she’d needed these moments of abandon.
Amelia threw her arm around Katie’s shoulder and gave a quick squeeze. The warmth quelled the deep loneliness that had earlier pressed in. Was it a coincidence that Katie had said that small prayer one moment, and her sister had arrived the next?
They walked in silence, through the trees and up the hillside, each lifting their face to the warmth.
At last, Amelia pulled her to a stop. “You’re not all right, are you?”
Katie turned from her sister’s perceptive gaze “I’m trying. I truly am.” She pointed down over the valley. “We walked quite a long way.”
“Don’t change the subject. I need to know.”
“What’s the point of discussing it?”
Amelia’s arms encircled Katie’s shaking shoulders and she drew her close. “I know you better than that, Sis. Please talk to me.”
A lone tear slipped free, and Katie brushed it angrily from her cheek. “I have no choice in the matter. However, Mr. Richardson has no idea what his money is buying.” A cold chill spread over her, and she shivered in Amelia’s arms. “He can make his plans, but he can’t buy my love.”
“Let’s run away together.” Amelia pulled back. With a determined look she raised her head. “Then there’d be enough room at Aunt May’s?—"
“Don’t think I haven’t thought about running, but then I think of Pa, and I know what I have to do. Besides Pa would never make me marry Mr. Richardson if I hadn’t agreed.”
Her sister’s big brown eyes filled with tears. They rolled down her cherub cheeks. “But it’s not right.”
Katie pulled away.
“Surely you don’t intend to follow through with this?” Amelia’s eyes widened into huge saucers. “Just tell Pa how you feel.”
“No, and you have to promise you won’t breathe a word. The war taught me one big lesson—life is not fair. At least I’m still alive, whereas Scott and Jonathon gave everything, and they’reno longer here to help Pa. I need to do this. Does that make sense?”
Amelia’s hands twisted in the folds of her dress as giant tears coursed down her face.
Katie pulled a handkerchief out of the pocket of her calico skirt. “Here.” She held out the lace-trimmed rumpled ball.
Amelia took one look. “I’ll make do.”
