Page 80 of Mafia Shade's Reluctant Bride
MARIA
Last night was everything. He was everything. Everything I had wanted, everything I had hoped for, and everything I had dreamed of. But that was the problem. Lorenzo and I was a fantasy. A wonderful dream.
The realization hit like a wave crashing over me. My heart pounded against my ribs, and for a moment, I just lay there, staring at the ceiling, replaying last night in my mind.
It was reckless. It was stupid. It was the best sex I had in years—since him. I didn’t dare mention his name. I was already crashing out.
I turned my head, my gaze falling on Lorenzo. He was still asleep, his breathing slow and steady, lips slightly parted. He looked peaceful. Like a man who wasn’t constantly carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. He looked like something straight out of a fairytale. That was it. I was living in a fairytale because this wasn’t supposed to happen.
Two days of being alone with Lorenzo and being cared for by him had made me believe in this lie we had going on. I had let my guard down and let myself feel things I had no business feeling. And now? Now, I was panicking.
I sat up carefully, ignoring the way my body ached in places I hadn’t felt in a long time. It was a reminder of how completely I had given in to him. I needed to go. I needed to get dressed, to put distance between us before I did something even more foolish—like believe this could actually mean something.
The conversation from the other night echoed in my mind, the mention of the shipment and the realization that I didn’t truly know the man lying next to me. Then, there was his response about becoming a beast.
What the fuck was wrong with me? I had a son for a known mafia—like that wasn’t messy enough.
My fingers trembled as I reached for my clothes, pulling them on as quietly as possible. I had just grabbed my sweater when a voice, rough with sleep, stopped me in my tracks.
“You’re running.”
I stiffened, my back still to him. “I’m getting dressed.”
“Yeah,” he muttered, the rustling of sheets telling me he was sitting up. “And running.”
I pulled my sweater over my head, inhaling sharply before turning to face him. “Lorenzo, about last night.”
“Don’t Maria, please don’t,” he wasn't commanding me. It was more of a plea, an awful familiarity in his voice that made my stomach churn.
“Lorenzo, you and I know that this was not meant to happen. We, this, it is all a lie. A dream,” the word tasted so bitter in my mouth as I spat them out.
Lorenzo’s jaw tensed. His eyes, still heavy with sleep, sharpened with something else. “That’s a lie.”
I crossed my arms. “You’re just trying to convince yourself that this is real because of sex.”
He ran a hand through his hair, exhaling harshly. “You think I just realized this after sex?” He shook his head, getting out of bed, completely unbothered by his state of undress. “It might have started as a deal, but that’s not what this is anymore.”
My eyes caught a glimpse of his body, his muscular, brooding body, and just below my eyes went down to the length of him, which was and which was normal considering he just woke up. Everything about the sight of him threw my mind to how he thrust deep inside of me last night and filled me up with every inch of him. I immediately shrugged the thought away. I forced myself to hold his gaze. “It is for me.”
A flicker of hurt flashed in his eyes before he quickly masked it. “That’s bullshit.”
I swallowed hard, ignoring the way my chest tightened. “You need your mother to sign off on the inheritance, and I need my father’s inheritance. That’s all this is. Why do we want to make this complicated when it is this simple?”
“Stop.” His voice was low and controlled, but there was an edge to it. “You’re scared, and instead of dealing with it, you’re trying to convince yourself that none of this is real.”
I clenched my fists. “Because it’s not.”
Lorenzo took a step closer, closing the space between us. “Then look me in the eye and tell me you don’t feel anything for me.”
I pressed my lips together, my throat tightening.
Say it. Say it and walk away.
But I couldn’t because it would be a lie.
Lorenzo’s gaze searched mine, his voice quieter now. “Why can’t we be together?”
The question hit like a punch to the gut.
