Page 25 of Catch Me
“You there?” Sen asked.
“Yeah, sorry. Just cooking.”
“So, what are you gonna do?”
“I don’t know. There’s not much I can do. I’m under contract and I can’t just risk my entire career. In theory, I would, but it’s not that simple.”
“Yeah, I get it. We need people like you to keep fighting, but it feels like there’s a wall no matter which direction you go in. At my job, I didn’t want them to find out I was gay, but I wasn’t okay with hiding and Kai wanted to have lunch with me some days, so everyone knows. My manager straight up asked me not to talk about it. He said it's fine, but it should stay at home.”
“Jesus. What’d you say?”
“I told Kai, which was a mistake.” Despite his words, he laughed. “He came in, sporting a shirt that made his biceps look amazing, and he introduced himself to everyone. I think they’re a little shocked by him because, and I quote, ‘he doesn’t look gay.’ He kissed me like a madman, then asked if that looked gay. Now that my eyes are open to it, I see all these hurdles we still have to clear, even though they say we’ve achieved equality.”
“And that’s why I can’t stop. If we cave when people try to silence us, we won’t break through those fucking walls.”
“Well, they said to tone it down. Maybe do that but don’t actually stop. Change your approach or something.”
With a sigh, I dropped into a barstool and poked at my omelet. “I need more people on this. If the content is spread out and it’s not just me, it’ll shift some of the spotlight without taking away from the issue.”
“I bet Brooks would be all for getting on TikTok and going off. If he can convince Tilian, they might start a revolution.”
“Bring out the guillotine!” the crazy fucker shouted in the background.
“What about you?” I asked cautiously.
The silence made me regret bringing it up. I didn’t want to pressure him. If he said no, I wouldn’t broach the subject again, but I wanted to at least ask.
“I want to,” Sen replied. “My therapist thinks it might actually be good for me, but only if I’m comfortable with it. He also told me it’s likely to stir up things that I thought I’d moved past, so I want to be ready for that. Kai says he’ll be here to make sure I getthrough it, but he devotes too much of himself to others—me especially.”
“That’s the way he shows love, Sen. Let him love you.”
“He doesn’t really give me a choice anyway. But yeah, I’ll do it. I just don’t know when.”
“Whenever you’re comfortable. Is it okay if I share some things with people to get them interested in watching your story?”
“Sure.”
“You, Seneca Taylor, are amazing. I knew it the moment I saw you on that dock with your feet in the water.”
“Is that why you came up to me?”
I thought back on that day, the first one at Camp Dumont. The truth was, I’d been just as terrified, but I’d known that I didn’t want to change.
“I went up to you because I wanted to help you stay strong so they wouldn’t break you. I wanted to keep you safe.”
I’m sorry I failed you.
Those words always got stuck in my throat. I knew that he didn’t blame me. That wasn’t the issue. I blamed myself, not just for what happened at camp but also for leaving him there, for never trying to find him on social media. Most importantly, I blamed myself for moving on and forgetting about that terrified thirteen-year-old kid who got slapped so hard by his dad that it still haunted me.
Chapter 9
Travis
I could hear Pete’s voice in my head as my finger hovered over the ‘post’ button. It wasn’t bad to share resources that teens could look into, right? They couldn’t call it activism, could they?
Ever since Saturday, I had been overthinking it. He hadn’t made the situation any clearer, so I wasn’t sure what I was allowed to do. If they tried to push back against what I’d been doing prior to getting more serious, I would have a lot of things to say about it. Pulling back a little was one thing. There was no way I’d stop altogether.
I tapped the button, then let out a breath. It felt good to dosomething. My mind, the chaotic goblin that it was, wanted to take things further. The impulsive side of me said to go all in. Call out the states, the politicians, the media, corporations, the fucking president. Demand better.
