Page 90 of The Wolf and the Chimera
Much to Ryder’s immense satisfaction, she had driven me to snarl at Melanie serval times for getting too close to her mate. This morning, when Kieran had tried to convince Ryder to leave us to train with the other werewolves and my parents, rage had flooded my veins as hot as my magic.
Why should Ryder be anywhere but atourside?
Though Ryder needed to learn to wield his dominance like a weapon, he refused, largely because of my out-of-control instincts. He was the only thing that calmed my inner beast.
I had thought gaining access to my power would make me stronger, but it had only turned me into a greater liability.
And an emotional one.
The constant torrent of the beast’s feelings had worn my temper down. Though I had vowed to find my stronger self, part of me now wished to retreat to the girl I had been before I had ever met my inner beast.
Besides, she refused to come to the surface to do anything more than snarl and posture. Her antics were entirely useless.
I had begged Circe to begin my training today with combat, if only to try to wear my monstrous side down, but thewitch had glowered at me and told me that learning my true history was the only way to fully understand my inner beast.
As my hunger for Ryder rose and my frustration over the distance between us swelled, I didn’twantto understand my inner beast.
I wanted her to shut up.
“Why does it matter what I’mreallythinking about?” I asked Ryder. “You’re not going to do anything about it.”
I couldn’t believe the bold words had come out of my mouth, but I didn’t snatch them back. As his power swelled, Ryder’s woodsy, masculine scent flooded the room. Heat curled in the pit of my stomach.
“Your attitude proves why I’m right to use restraint,” he said and clenched his jaw. “You’re not acting like yourself.”
My face burned. Ryder was right—even Circe had said I possessed the discipline of a child. Knowing he only held back to honor me, however, did nothing to ease my stinging pride. Because of my lack of control, Ryder and I acted more like roommates than soulmates. Well, roommates with alotof sexual frustration.
Control, control, control…
“Ellie,” Ryder said in a velvet-soft voice. “You know I want you—”
“I know I’m supposed to be reading,” I snapped, “and your interruptions are making that exceptionally hard to do.”
Ryder growled, but before he could reply, someone behind me sighed. I swiveled in my seat and found Circe glaring at both of us from the open doorway.
“I see your studies are going well.” The witch’s voice dripped with sarcasm. “Why don’t you two claim the bond already so we might actually accomplish something?”
Though my beast preened, Ryder cursed, and I balked.
“What do you mean?” I asked quietly. “Claim the bond? We’re mates. Isn’t that all there is to it?”
Circe studied Ryder, then me, and shook her head.
“Ask your mate about it sometime,” the witchinstructed. “For now, tell me what you’ve learned in the past hour.”
I thought back to the ceremony Ryder had mentioned for newly mated couples and realized that must be what “claiming the bond” meant. My mind, however, became caught on the fact that an hour had passed, and I had learned nothing.
“Um,” I said, “chimeras were once protectors of all shifters thanks to their powerful forms.”
A muscle in Circe’s jaw twitched. “And?”
I struggled to think about the words that had blurred across the pages. I was an adept reader, but between Ryder’s presence and the extra set of instincts wreaking havoc on my mind, focusing had been a challenge.
So much for becoming stronger,I thought.Now, even the things I was once good at are impossible.
My answer sounded like a question. “They were a matriarchal society?”
Circe growled in frustration.
