Page 55 of Inglorious
“No, I’ve desired Nanci for years, but because of… Psych, I held back. I’m not making a move because Psych’s gone.” That was hard to admit, and I swallowed. “If Psych had been here, I’d have got the green light to make Nanci mine. That makes me a little lost because I ain’t fuckin’ asking their parents for their blessings, cunts that they are.”
“Psych didn’t get on with them?”
“Fuck no. And Nanci hates them too.”
“Surely not having to ask permission and court a rejection makes it easier to date Nanci?”
“Yes and no. It brings home that Nanci has no one in the world, but also, I can be the support she needs.”
For the remainder of the hour, we continued to discuss my feelings about Nanci and how the past might affect future plans. When the session ended, I was a little surprised. I’d been through an emotional wringer today, and I desperately needed some riding time to clear the whirlwind of thoughts in my head.
Just as I reached out to open the door, Janet spoke. “Inglorious. Before you leave, there is a question I need to ask.”
“What?”
“On a scale of one to ten, how prevalent is suicide in your thoughts?”
The question actually shocked me, and I took a few moments to consider my answer. “If you’d asked six months, hell, even six weeks ago, I’d have said high. Until I got sober, I was wrapped in grief and guilt. Those emotions remain, but I’m starting to heal and see a future. Do I want to kill myself? No, Janet, I’d say therisk of suicide is negligible. The thought might cross my mind that I’d be better off dead with my brothers, but I owe it to them to keep living.”
The last few words stunned me.
I owed it to them to live.
Janet nodded. “Now, you understand.”
“Yeah. Their memories survive in me. If I die or hit the bottle again, their memory fades. Shit. I owe it to them to live the best life possible. Thanks, Doc.”
“Nope, this was all you. We still need to meet Inglorious, but I’m glad you’re finding your way,” Janet said and opened the door. She offered a warm smile as I left and headed down the stairs to my hog.
It was time to ride.
Nanci
Inglorious was overdue in returning from his appointment with Janet—over five hours late—and I was worried he’d hit a bar. Just as I was considering sending Vortex and Hercules out to search, Inglorious roared up and parked. Relief swamped me as Inglorious swung off his bike, and then I took a second glance.
Whenever anyone looked at Inglorious, you could see he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. As Inglorious stretched, showing a tantalising glimpse of a muscled stomach, I noticed he seemed lighter.
“Wow, what happened to him?” Hercules muttered.
“Does Inglorious seem—”
“Easier? Yes. Looks like Inglorious might have had a breakthrough in therapy,” Hercules replied.
To my surprise, Inglorious tilted his head towards us but wandered away in the construction’s direction.
“What’s he up to?” I wondered and took off after him. Hercules snorted from behind me, and I ignored him. Inglorious disappeared into one of the old shops, and I hightailed it inside.
As my eyes adjusted to the gloom, a strong embrace swept me up and pinned me against the wall.
“Hello, baby,” Inglorious muttered as his head descended and his lips claimed mine.
Instinctively, I moulded myself to his body as Inglorious hauled me closer and held me tighter. My arms wrapped around his neck as the kiss deepened, sending familiar shivers down my spine. Heat pooled between my legs as Inglorious showed he meant business with this kiss.
This one was slightly different from the last. This one seemed claiming, and I lost myself in sensation as Inglorious made a satisfied noise. He broke the kiss and trailed feather-light ones down the side of my throat.
I gasped and shivered in response. My nipples hardened, and my entire body responded to Inglorious’s attentions.
“Inglorious,” I murmured as he moved a little, and his hands held my waist. Deftly, Inglorious popped the buttons on my jeans and slipped a hand inside. My legs opened of their own accord as a finger slid down my panties and found my clit. I moaned as he flicked it, and the wetness intensified.
