Page 39 of Slow Burn
Levi is shirtless, in my favorite gray sweats and a bundled-up Amelia in one arm. He looks sad, although his blue eyes light with fire the moment he sees me there. I ache to touch him, realizing the past twenty-four hours are the longest I've gone without touching him in months. I don't like the itchy, scratchy way leaving like that made me feel. Seeing him now, it fades away, replaced with that buzzing heat he always ignites inside me.
“Hey. Come on.” Levi steps aside, but doesn't touch me as I push in past him.
I smell him; his soap and shampoo and justhim.I also breath deep the sweet, clean baby smell of Amelia. I head for the living room, safe, neutral ground, sinking into the sofa. Levi folds into his new favorite chair across from me, watching me. We say nothing. Before I know what I'm doing, I am crawling across the floor towards them.
“Brynn...” Levi's voice is strangled when I reach them. I don't know what to do or what to say to make it right.
Right then, I just know I need them. Need to touch them, feel Amelia’s hair brush my cheek, smell the two of them together, feel their heartbeats. I stay in a kneeling position, my head bowed as tears burn hot down my face. Not for him or her, or even me, really. For every bad choice I ever made. Every single thing I lost. And, for the girl who thought she deserved to lose it all.
“I choose you. I chose you in a barn while we danced to Landslide in the summer. I choose Amelia. The moment I saw you with that little Princess, I chose the both of you. I....thought I made the right choice once, for the right reasons. One choice wrecked me, Levi. I don't think I got right again until that road trip with you.” Levi brought me into his lap, cradling both me and Amelia.
“I want you to choose us for the right reasons, honey. Because being here with us and making a life together is right for us, Brynn. I got it wrong before so I know we got it right this time. I choose you because the idea of doing this without you...Brynn it scares me more than any fire I ever walked into. I spent most my life completely alone but the first person to make me feel like I'm part of something is you. You and our daughter. The three of us...it's the best thing I have ever had. I would do anything for my girls, anything to make this work, to make a life with you.” As my arms wind around his shoulders, Amelia nestled between us, I touch my forehead to his as I choose them both.
“I love you, Levi. I love Amelia. I love us. I love you so much it scares the shit out of me. I don't make the right choices. Last night, I should have...” Levi is kissing me, soft and sweet, effectively shutting me up.
“Fuck, I love you too, honey. Didn't know I could find something like this, that feels this good, this big. You and Amelia are my fucking world, Brynn. I will get it right this time, even if we both make bad choices. I love you so much. I will do whatever it takes to give my girls a fucking fairytale, like I promised. We can tear this entire fucking castle down and start again if you need it. I didn't think about.... what this place looked like to you. Like another woman's home,”
“Whatever paint is on the walls or chair I sit in or photos on the wall, it’s only ever been our home. Tell me if I need to move us to a new place, or fuck, a new city. You girls, you're my fucking world, Brynn. Anything it takes.” I dropped my lips over his, sealing that promise with fire and heat.
Between us, Amelia fussed and we both laughed, breaking away. She reached for me and I bent to cuddle her too, the ache in my heart from a full day apart easing. The three of us cuddled on the couch, Levi soothing us both until Amelia and I passed out. I remember the bouncy music from Moana and then nothing.
I woke sometime later, a tangle of man and baby limbs trapping me. I twisted into them, and in the darkness, I promised I would make the right choices. For them. For Levi and for Amelia. For my family.
Starting with finding a way to keep Bernie away without Levi or Amelia getting hurt.
