Page 25 of Slow Burn
8
BRYNN
Grand castles with arcing, sky high towers are less complex than the fortress I am building with Levi. Giggling with his tiny Princess while she steals my heart with her bright blue eyes, ginger curls and chunky cheeks, I can do. Levi on a white horse with his honesty and promises as his weapons? No armor can keep that man out.
How to navigate the fantasy Levi wants us to live is something else.
Mostly because he does a damn fine job of making it seem so easy to live. Levi needed exactly one morning—with the added bonus of two orgasms—and one evening to demolish the walls I had so carefully constructed. Not that they were good, high walls, really. They weren't. Basically, just Levi size, easily crumbled beneath the efforts he put in.
We somehow settled into a sort of domestic bliss without me realizing it. Seems he made that easy too. Levi brought us dinner on days I told him Amelia had been fussy. Cooked it on the nights I was too enamored with a certain Princess to beat him to it. Texted me throughout our days about everything and nothing at all.
Levi: I am starving. What's for lunch, baby?
Me: For me? Greek salad.
Levi: Save me your olives.
Me: Already did. What will you have, though?
Levi: Hmm, Brynn salad? I mean, that's what sounds delicious. And nutritious.
Me: Har. Har. Your Princess misses you.
Levi: Hope my queen does too.
Me: Does that make you the king?
Levi: Damn right. King of the castle I share with my girls.
Swoon. The man made me swoon.
It was easy to flirt and be open with him in words and playful moments in the kitchen. Easy to cuddle on the couch watching Game of Thrones as an excuse to make out like teenagers. Or play with Amelia in the nursery we built together. It had always been easy with him, if I let myself forget about one morning. Onemomentof one morning.
A moment that gave me bricks to build a feeble excuse of protection against him. Once he saw it crumbling, Levi bulldozed right through with the truth and sweet vulnerability. Levi left me defenseless once he reminded me how this magical thing between us had begun. The things we said all those months ago; and more importantly, the one thing he hadn't.
I was all but swooning over Levi that first weekend. In fact, I might have literally swooned. So God damn good looking. Funny, sweet, romantic even. He made me laugh and held my hand, kissed my fingertips as he let me pick the music while we drove back from Hunter and Lola's wedding. I was in very, very deep like.
We had nothing in common whatsoever. And that's why it made so much sense. He had adoring, loving parents who he missed like crazy after they died in a fire. I had cold, unforgiving ones who I never missed but were a call away. I grew up with the best of everything and he lived on the streets. We should not make sense. And yet, we did.
For three days, I knew happiness unlike any I knew could be possible. Unlike I'd ever felt. We'd left a wedding and as foolish as that man made me feel, I'd have said yes to another one, had he asked. Unfortunately, he was already married.
Levi left that detail out of our three-day soul baring tour.
“Your married? Present tense? Legally bound to another woman? While I spread my legs like an idiot in the backseat of a car?” I had been livid; mostly because I felt shamed, embarrassed. Fooled.
“Legally yes. Brynn, please. Let me explain...It is not what you think.”
And, maybe it wasn't. Maybe I should have let him explain.When he chased after me. Or when he called. Then messaged me. Then both. Endlessly, for days; perhaps I should have listened. Given us both a Goddamn chance. Might have saved me four months of heartbreak.
I'm a stubborn bitch though, so I fled. Didn't have the courage to leave Chicago, though, of course. I might have come here to see Lola. To escape my troubles. The truth, though? I stayed because I was waiting. For Levi.
Waiting for him to give me the words to make me forgive his lies.
“Four months, Levi,” I'd accused yesterday morning after he gave me plenty of words. Plus, the bonus orgasms. Two mind altering, wall shattering orgasms, to be exact.
“I was right here. Waiting. Making excuse after excuse to keep waiting. For. Four.Months.” I'd basically pouted.
“I knew I blew it, honey. Knew you were right to walk away. I was always waiting too, though. I just thought you needed time to forgive me.” Levi was both right on target and way off base.
