Page 62 of Ripped & Shipped
Nope. No gladiators for this girl.
Definitely not the angry gladiator across the table from me, wearing a backward ball cap and a too-tight white T-shirt. I almost see steam pouring out his ears.
“Down, boy. This is just a message. I am blocking him. Watch me.” I add a joke to diffuse some of the tension wafting off Chris. “I mean, you should see the messages I get from foreign princes.”
“What? What messages?”
Oh. I forgot Chris is a newb when it comes to social media. I flash him my phone to confirm that beefitupfitnessdude is officially blocked.
He smiles.
Then I pull up a message from some random guy posing as a prince and read it to Chris.
“Elllozzzz, my beauty beautiful queen. You are so fine to look at. I wish you all the prosperity this glorious day. I want to tell you I have many fine things. And those are all for you. Even the 5,000 dollars a month you can spend any way you like. You are meant to be my queen. Only say the word, my beauty. Have a highly beneficial day!”
I look up, a big smile on my face. I’m lightly chuckling until I meet Chris’ stony glare.
“Guys send you this kind of stuff?”
“Chris. Oh my gosh. This may not even be a guy. I mean, look at his picture.”
I tap the profile and a photo fills the screen of a middle-aged man with a poodle and a bouquet of roses. He’s sitting outside in front of a yacht.
“He looks like a guy to me.”
“This is just some random picture.” I explain like I’m teaching preschool. “Look.”
I show him the other photos. The same man posing in front of a sports car. Another one of him sipping wine somewhere near an ocean.
“These aren’t photos of the guy sending that message, I’m sure. And who says,Elllozzzz?What even is that?”
I can’t help but laugh.
“Did you block him too?”
I don’t want to even give Chris the satisfaction, but for some reason, I have mercy on the man.
“Yes. I blocked him. But I saved the message because it makes me laugh.”
Chris nods, satisfied that I’m not being hotly pursued by a foreign prince.
“I sure could use that five K a month, though,” I joke.
“Who couldn’t? Maybe I need to find a foreign prince.”
“Right? He’d treat you so well with all his fine things. They would give you prosperity on this fine day.”
“So beneficial,” Chris jokes back.
Oh, girls. If you could see this man smile. I can’t even. It’s so rare when he lets one loose. My goodness. Women would be in danger of spontaneous ovary combustion if they saw that smile up close.
I’m doubly relieved because Chris seems to have regained his sense of humor. All this talk of stalkers was bringing too much negativity into my day.
CHAPTER22
Chris
My phone is sittingon the kitchen counter ringing when I come in from mowing the back yard. I grab it. Aiden’s calling.
