Page 43 of Avoiding Temptation
“Honestly?” he asks between light kisses to my neck which have my nipples pebbling behind my bra. “No. Never. I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m usually a fuck ‘em and chuck ‘em kind of guy.”
I’m not at all surprised, but the way he says it so casually makes me wince.
“Don’t go thinking that my partners were under any illusion that it was anything other than what it was. Sex. I’ve never wanted to spend time with someone like I do with you. I’ve never wanted a repeat like I do with you. I’ve never wanted anything from any of the people I’ve slept with before.”
“You want something from me?” I ignore my other curiosity: that he only refers to his previous bed mates as partners or people. I pretty much figured the night I saw him dancing with and kissing anyone in touching distance that he didn't discriminate where sex was concerned. I was brought up with the idea that a woman and man meet, get married and give themselves to their spouse and their spouse only. But standing here, knowing Joe as I do, I really don’t care about that part of his past.
I hope when my truth comes out, he doesn’t hold it against me.
“Everything, Quinn. I want everything.”
He spins me so we’re face-to-face. The intensity in his eyes as he stares down at me causes my stomach to drop.He wants things you can’t offer him. Not yet, anyway.
“Joe, I—”
“Shhh. I didn’t say that to freak you out or for you to tell me you want the same from me. I just want you to know that this isn’t just a bit of fun for me. How I feel about you isn’t a temporary thing. I know it’s complicated. I know there are a million reasons why we shouldn't be here. But we are. We’re here. We’re together, and I can’t imagine anywhere else I want to be right now.”
His lips find mine, and his tongue sweeps into my mouth, searching for mine. Everything he’s just expressed is confirmed by the way his lips move. The emotion he pours into it causes tears to burn the backs of my eyes.
What he said is everything I’ve ever wanted: a man who’s passionate about what he wants…about me. But right now couldn’t be a worse time for it.
“Fuck. I want to be inside you so badly.”
“What’s stopping you?”
“The fact that we’ve got reservations and that I’ve been listening to your stomach rumbling the entire journey here.”
“It was not,” I argue, although it’s weak at best. I’m starving. If it wasn’t for him and his distraction techniques, the only thing I’d be able to think about would be food.
“I might need you more than my next breath, but I also need you with a little energy. I don’t plan on sleeping much tonight, so you’re going to need some sustenance.”
My lips form an O, and he steps away from me.
“We’ve got thirty minutes—not that you need it, because you look stunning already—but do what you need to do and we’ll find you some food.”
I’m rooted to the floor, still reeling from his kiss as he falls onto the sofa and grabs the TV remote, waking it up and finding it on a 24/7 news channel.
I don't think anything of it as I go to my bag and rummage around for something to wear.
It’s not until I hear the headlines for the next story that I freeze.
“The latest private school scandal hit the headlines this morning. According to the police, there have been over one-hundred victims in contact to tell their story about abuse at Earlington Manor. The head teacher has been—”
“Turn it off.” My voice is barely a whisper, making Joe turn to look at me so I can repeat my words. I do so before his eyes even find mine.
“Okay, okay. Is this okay?” he asks, turning the channel and finding a repeat of an old US sitcom.
My hands tremble, and my cold blood turns my body to ice at just hearing those words from the TV.
“Quinn?” he asks, walking over and placing his hands on my upper arms. “Are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
I have,I think as memories from my past life threaten to surface.
“I’m sorry. I just can’t watch that. I’ve worked with too many kids who’ve been affected by that kind of abuse, and I can’t hear any more of it.”
He eyes me curiously, correctly guessing that there’s a lot more to this than I’m letting on.
“I’m okay, I promise.” It’s a bare-faced lie and he knows it, but when I move towards the bathroom with a change of clothes and my wash bag, he allows me the space I need.
