Page 12 of Falling for the Forbidden
“Please,” I whisper. I can’t think of anything worse than him walking out and leaving me alone right now, but it’s not enough. No sooner does the word pass my lips, he’s up on his feet and backing away from the bed.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be here.” His voice is full of regret as he stares at me. Eventually, he turns and disappears from my sight. His footsteps thunder down the stairs and the sound of the front door slamming shakes the entire house.
* * *
Ben never came back homethat night, or the next day. Once I knew he’d really left the house that night, I let all my frustration out. I cried for longer than I’m willing to admit. My tears were full of disappointment, regret…and desire. I want to be able to say there was some shame in there, but there wasn’t. And in a way, I’m ashamed for not feeling it. Nothing about that kiss and his touch felt shameful. Every moment since he walked out of my room, I’ve been craving more. More of his kiss. More of his touch. More of everything. He’s taking over my thoughts.
It’s not until the following Wednesday that I get to lay my eyes on him again since that dark night. I’m sitting, staring at my computer screen, trying to look busy, when the door to the office is pulled open.
I look up. I don’t usually bother because no one’s ever looking for me, but somehow, my body knows it’s him.
Instead of the shirt he should be wearing as he meets with customers, he’s clad in a hi-vis jacket and dirty work clothes. Dirt is smeared across both cheeks and his hands are mostly black. Every muscle in my body tenses.
Swallowing, I try to get some moisture back in my mouth and drag my eyes away from him before he notices my attention.
I keep an eye on him over the top of my monitor as he walks in and has a very short and sharp conversation with my dad. I can sense the tension between them from here. I don’t miss the tightness of Ben’s muscles, the pulsing in his neck, or his clenched fists as he stands just inside the door to the office.
After a few short words, he turns to leave, but at the last minute, he looks up. Our gazes lock and something sparks between us. His eyes brighten but he shows no other signs that he feels the same pull between us that I do.
Our connection only lasts for a couple of seconds, but when he pulls his eyes away and walks out of the office, it’s with his shoulders sagging in defeat.
My fingers curl around the base of my chair as I fight my need to follow him, to find out what’s going on and why he looks so sad.
“Lauren,” Dad barks. “Are you going to answer that or just let it annoy the shit out of all of us?” It’s not until Dad’s finished talking that I even realise the phone on my desk is ringing. I take a deep breath in an attempt to compose myself before lifting the handset to my ear.
Just like almost every other time it’s rung this morning, the caller asks for Jenny or Dad. Most days, I don’t feel like I’m needed or really wanted here to do anything with the accounts. Instead, I seem to be becoming Dad’s personal PA.
“I’m sorry, but Jenny is out of the office today. I can put you through to Nick.” Dad glares at me from his desk. He told me earlier to put off any callers, but after watching the way he was with Ben, I’ve no real desire to do as I’m told.
Thankfully, after he’s taken the phone call he didn’t want, Dad leaves the office. The atmosphere immediately lightens and Erica even puts the radio on, which is banned while the boss is around.
The day goes on forever, my thoughts consumed by the look on Ben’s face as he dragged his gaze away from me earlier. Every time I hear the main door to the office squeak, my heart jumps into my throat, but he never reappears. I can only hope he might make it home tonight so at least I can find out if he’s okay.
“We’re going out tonight,” Erica announces after following me into the kitchen to get her lunch from the fridge.
“Tonight?”
“Yeah. Wednesday’s the new Friday.”
“I thought every night was a Friday night in London,” I grin.
“Exactly.” She winks at me, throwing her tub of leftovers into the microwave. “You’ve been moping for days. You need a good blow out. I’ll shoot a message out to the guys. They’ll be on board.”
I know it’s pointless arguing, but to be honest, a night out and letting loose does sound like a good idea. I almost ask her not to tell the guys because the last thing I need is Ben ruining another night for me, but I bite the words back, knowing it’ll only invite unwanted questions.
“Yeah, okay.”
“I’m going to have to work a little late, though. How about you go home and grab your stuff, then we’ll get ready together at mine? I’ve already got tequila in the fridge.”
“Sounds good.”
The more I think about it as the afternoon wears on, the more I’m looking forward to it. Erica keeps me informed about who’s coming, and when I don’t hear that Ben’s presence is confirmed, I feel even better about it. The last thing I need is him trying to ruin my evening by telling me what I should and shouldn’t be doing.
“Girl! You look hot,” Erica sings when I step into the kitchen in the house she shares with her sister. She runs her eyes up and down my body, nodding in approval. I’m wearing a black leather skirt and a gold sequined cami with an open back. “I’m going to have to pry the men off you tonight.”
“What if I don’t want you to?” I ask with a wink.
“Ooh, are you planning on hooking up?”
