Page 37 of Falling For Liam
“Yes,” he states all matter-of-fact, like the words don’t tip my world on its axes. I know I told him to treat me like any other date, but I wasn’t anticipating this. My heart begins to race and relief washes through me when I see the waiter walking our way.
“Would you like to order desserts?”
“You choose,” I say, turning to Liam. “I just need…” My words trail off as I stand and begin to walk away. “I just need a minute,” I mutter to myself.
His stare. His words. His touch. They all make me want things I shouldn’t. It’s been only weeks since I ran out on my boyfriend and his monster of a brother. Shouldn’t I still be dealing with the fallout from that? Shouldn’t I be heartbroken? I definitely shouldn’t be here with a man, wanting nothing more than for him to take me home. I want him to make me forget, but it’s more than that. I don’t want to use him for escape from my nightmares. I just want him. I want him so much I’m scared. Scared I’m doing the wrong thing. Scared I’m not ready. Scared he’s going to shatter my heart into a million pieces because he can’t possibly want me the way I want him. He says all the right words, makes me believe he could. But what happens when he decides he doesn’t and I’m left alone, but not from my own doing?
I spend too long in the toilets, staring at myself in the mirror and giving myself a good talking to. I don’t walk out of there any less confused than when I walked in, but I do feel a little more grounded. I tell myself to stop worrying about the what ifs and what I believe to be the right thing to do in this situation. Who says there’s a right thing to do, anyway?
“There you are. I was just going to come and find you.”
“Whoa, that’s a big one,” I comment, dragging my eyes from his concerned face to the giant ice cream sundae sitting in the centre of our table.
“That’s what I hear,” he says with a wink, a cheeky smile twitching at his lips. “Is everything okay?” he asks after a beat, his voice serious all of a sudden.
“Yeah, fine. Just ignore me.”
“Not likely.”
My cheeks flush at his words and I drop to my chair, which is still pulled close to his. “Only one?”
“I thought it might be romantic.” He shrugs but I can sense that he’s now questioning his decision.
“Well, it looks incredible.”
“Here,” he says, scooping up a spoonful of ice cream covered in chocolate sauce. His focus is zeroed on my lips as I part them to allow him to place the spoon inside my mouth. As the sweetness of the sauce hits my tongue, I can’t help but groan, my eyes flickering closed.
Liam clearing his throat has my eyes popping open. I watch as he shifts about in his seat while staring aimlessly out the window.
“Everything okay?” I try to keep a straight face but the second his dark, lust-filled eyes find mine, it kickstarts a throb inside me that has my mouth dropping open in surprise.
“Yeah, perfect. You?”
“Yeah. Want some?”
I return the favour with the ice cream and I totally understand what his issue was. The second he moans in pleasure, I swear I’m seconds away from exploding.
“I think we should get out of here.”
“Sure.” I try to sound confident but the second he suggests leaving, my panic hits me again full-force. I want to enjoy this, him, but I’m concerned it’s more likely that I’m going to royally screw it up.
Thankfully, Liam insists on paying the bill. I was too busy worrying about everything else to think about how the hell I was going to afford this extravagant meal. I’m waiting for my bankcard to give up any moment; I’m sure this bill would have finished it off.
“Come on, there’s a taxi waiting,” Liam says, pulling me from my thoughts.
“Okay.” Standing, I feel his eyes run the length of me before lingering on my shoes. I’m reminded of his fascination with them at Nicole’s engagement party and the joy he took in unwrapping them from my legs. Warmth spreads up my neck and to my cheeks as memories of how his touch affected me that night slam into me.
I expect him to maybe thread our fingers together as we walk towards the exit, What I’m not expecting is for his hand to land on my waist and for him to pull me tightly into his side.
No words are said, but it’s like our bodies are talking as they move together perfectly. It conjures up images I really don’t need filling my head.
“Thank you for tonight,” I say after sitting in the suffocating silence of the taxi for what feels like forever. The tension surrounding us is incredible, and the closer we get to home, the more unsure I am of what my next actions should be.
I still want him, more than anything. But should I? Will I regret it tomorrow?
Glancing over at him, it appears at first sight that he’s totally relaxed as he sits back against the leather seat, but the closer I look, the more evidence I see that he’s just as agitated as I am. His jaw pops and a muscle in his neck pulses. When I get down to his waist, I spot his fists curled so tight that his knuckles are white.
He knows I’m watching him. His eyes follow me, but he says nothing. It seems I’m not the only one fighting an internal battle, but what’s he got to worry about?
