Page 13 of The Promise
My heart starts to slow just as my stomach turns over. “Fuck,” I say, as I pull at his arms to get him to letgo.
He holds me tight, probably thinking I’m going to try hitting him again, until I start to retch. He lets go pretty quickly at that point, allowing me to run to thebathroom.
I’m barely bent over the toilet when I feel him behind me, gathering my hair up and gently rubbing myback.
I need to tell him, but that will mean admitting the truth and having to deal with it. I’m currently enjoying being able to put it somewhat to the back of mymind.
* * *
“Are you okay?” he asks when I emerge from the bathroom a while later. I banished him so I could freshen up—also known as sitting on the edge of the bath, freaking out. I’m not enjoying this pregnancy so far, what with the sore boobs and frequentnausea.
“Yeah, I’ve just had a bit of a bug, I think I got it from Juliette’s kids,” I lie. It’s not lost on me that since we promised to tell each other the truth, the lies seem to be pilingup.
Blake gets me a glass of water and I sip at it, perching myself back on the edge of thesofa.
“I promise you, Addison, I haven’t slept with any of them. I never would have told you I hadn’t been with anyone since Kayleigh if it wasn’ttrue.”
“So why not tell me, then, if there’s nothing to reallyhide?”
“What, like,hey I really like you. By the way, I'm an escort, and women pay me to spend time with them.Yeah, that’s a great pick upline.”
“You could have just explained—explained yourreasons.”
“I’m ashamed of it, I guess. It’s not the sort of thing a single dad should bedoing.”
“Says who? You? You’re caring for your family; there’s nothing wrong with that, but lying aboutit…”
“I’m sorry, Addison. I should have told you and not let you find out likethat.”
“Yes, you shouldhave.”
“Whatnow?”
I know I should take this opportunity to be honest with him, and the words I don’t want to say out loud are right on the tip of my tongue, but at the last minute, I chicken out. “I don’t know,Blake.”
“I—” he starts, but I’m not sure I want to hear him begging, so I cut himoff.
“I’ve got a business opening in a matter of days. I have a million and one things to do. Can we just give it some time? I’ve no idea if I believe any of this, and I’ve really no clue if I can trust you,” I say honestly. The look on his face guts me, but in reality, I’ve only known Blake a few weeks, and for all I know, he could be a perpetualliar.
“I told my boss I was stopping when we started seeing each other, but he was desperate. I don’t really need the money from it now. My business is doing well, and with the money I made, I’ve bought a couple of properties I’m renting,” he says, gesturing to the building we’re standing in. “I just continued for the company. After losing Kayleigh, I had no intention of finding someone else, and escorting allowed me to get out of the house and meet people.” I raise an eyebrow at him. “Okay, women. But they were paying for my company, not to chat me up or get me into bed; they’d pay for Jason or one of the others if that was what they wanted. Most of them were divorced or widowed and wanted company—the same as me, really. The only difference was that they had the money to pay forit.”
“I think we need to start again,” I say, after a few minutes of silence. “I need to know this is all true before going any further with you. I won’t get stung again. I’m barely out of my last disastrous relationship; I really don’t need to fall head first intoanother.”
“I wouldn’t do that toyou.”
“But you have, Blake. Can’t you seethat?”
He leaves not long later, promising to be in touch soon. I could tell from his body language that he wasn’t impressed with my suggestion of starting again, but I don’t know what else to try. It’s that or nothing, as far I seeit.
I sit on the sofa, sipping my water and thinking about everything he said to me, when another wave of nausea washes over me. I’m just about to run to the bathroom when it subsides. Thinking it’s a sign, I grab my phone to make a doctor’s appointment. Ignoring the truth isn’t going to get me very far, so I’d better man up and accept the decision Imade.
After a brief chat with the receptionist, I have an appointment for a couple of days’ time. I guess I’d better get used to the idea of talking aboutit.
* * *
“Please take a seat,” the doctor says, after telling me her name—which I’ve already forgotten—and welcoming me into the room. “What can I help you withtoday?”
“I…I’m…” The words get stuck in mythroat.
