Page 50 of Come Apart
It has to be real. She has to feel it.
I compose an email.
Ally, I'm so glad I was there for your premiere. You were so fucking great, I can't get over it.
I've felt lucky every day, ever since the moment when you told Ryan to go fuck himself. Ever since you chose me.
But I've never felt luckier than last night.
I still can't believe my luck that you want anything to do with me. I pinch myself when I wake up, because I think I'm dreaming.
I'm sorry I keep trying to rush you. I didn't do things well before either. But, God, I love you so fucking much. I feel it everywhere, all the time, wherever I go. I love you so much, and every single inch between us hurts. I want you to live with me. I want you to be my wife.
But I know I'm getting ahead of myself.
I just want you to know I'm in it for the long haul, Ally.
You're the best thing in my life. I don't even know what my life was before I met you, because I can't imagine it without you. I can't imagine not coming home to see you glued to your Kindle again, pretending not to gasp over the dramatic twist in whatever it is you're reading. I can't imagine not arguing over what to watch on TV. Or not mocking old movies with you. I can't even imagine waking up and drinking all my tea, instead of losing half of it to you. I'd so much rather you have that half of my tea.
I'm sorry I'm here. I promise it has nothing to do with us. I'm still all in.
And I promise that when I get back to Los Angeles, I'll make this up to you in a much more... exciting way.
I'm all yours.
Love,
Luke
