Page 170 of Accidental Husband
I drain the shrimp and veggies. Turn off the burner.
"It was good. We were good. For a while. But then, we weren't. And I didn't love him anymore. I didn't realize it, but I didn't. I wasn't sure what happened. Or why. Or how I could stop it. And I…" She presses her lips together. "I didn't do anything about it."
I pass her the colander.
Her fingers brush mine as she takes it. "I knew. That Valentine's Day junior year when I called you crying. I knew we'd broken in some way. That I didn't understand the person he was then. That he didn't understand me. That there was some fatal flaw. But I was too scared to leave."
"Did he—"
"No, not like that. It was more… I was scared of what it would mean. About me. And about us, too."
"You and Jackson?"
"You and me." The pan sizzles as she stirs ingredients together. "I didn't think about it, consciously, but I think I knew, deep down. As long as I was with Jackson, things between us couldn't change."
"I know what you mean."
"Is that stupid?"
"No."
"I, um… we weren't having good sex. That's true. But it was me as much as him." She passes me the spoon. Steps backward. Moves to the couch.
"I don't believe that."
She presses her ass against the armrest. "You don't believe me?"
"I've fucked you, Jules. I know what it's like."
Her cheeks flush. "It's… God, I wish I could explain."
"You can."
"I… uh… hold on. I have to pee." She rushes to the bathroom and slams the door shut.
I try not to read into it.
My attention shifts to the stir fry. It's nearly done, but it will be another half an hour until the rice is ready.
My stomach growls from the scent of sesame and orange.
I put the burner on low. Pour a glass of water. Take a seat on the couch.
Jules joins me. She places her Bluetooth speaker on the coffee table, connects her phone, plays her favorite Paramore album.
"We listened to this in the car," I say.
"And?" Her lips curl into a half smile, but there's something off about it. Something missing.
"Fair point."
She turns the volume up. Leans back. Closes her eyes.
There's something about the way she soaks in a song. It's just so fucking Jules.
The chorus fades into the outro.
Into an intro.
