Page 269 of Hooking Up

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"Sweetness, you know I hate thinking about this."

"I know…"But you have to. It could happen. We have to be realistic.

"I'll make sure you get help." I brush her hair behind her ear.

Iris slipping is my worst nightmare.

At first, it was a plague on my thoughts, this constant fear she'd start getting high again. That I'd be the one to push her into using with some stupid fight.

I still wake up terrified some days. I still have moments where my head goes to dark places because she's too quiet. Or home late. Or evasive. Or moody.

I'll never get over it. Not completely.

But it gets easier every day.

The fear fades quickly now. I trust her.

I know it takes more than that. I know there are going to be times where it's harder or easier.

But, whatever happens, I want to be there to hold her up.

To ease her burden.

To watch her dreams come true.

"You want to talk about it, sweetness?"

"Later." She presses her lips to mine.

She tastes good, like sugar and coffee.

Like she's everything I want.

She pulls back with a sigh. "Can we go home? I need… I need things to make sense."

"Yeah." That is a brilliant idea. But—"I have a stop planned."

"Something good?"

"Yeah."

"What?"

"You trust me?"

"Yeah, but—"

"You trust me or not?"

"Of course."

"Then let me surprise you."

She stares into my eyes. Slowly, she nods.

I offer her my hand.

She takes it and I pull her to her feet. I pick up her shoes, then scoop her into my arms and carry her into the kitchen.

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