Page 114 of Hooking Up
It brings me back immediately. The way Lily smiled as she gushed over my homecoming dress. The frown when she didn't get into NYU. Her consoling me when I tried to dye my hair blond and ended up with bright orange locks.
She was my best friend all through college. And through the first year or so of everything. Until she realized how bad it was.
She gave me a choice. She confronted me. But I refused to get help. To choose her.
"Hey." Walker slides into his seat. He forces his lips into a smile, but frustration is still written all over his face.
"Everything okay?"
"Okay enough."
I push his drink toward him. "You were right. This place is good."
"You don't look happy."
"You either." I take a long sip. It tastes like love. Like a love I'm desperate to deserve again.
"Yeah." He stabs the plastic with his straw. Brings the drink to his lips. Takes a long sip.
This is getting to be an alarming trend.
What's wrong?
Nothing. Frown. Grunt.
I'm doing the same thing.
I'm going to be a psychologist and I can't talk about my feelings.
It's sad. Really, it is.
I want to be able to do this.
And I want to know him. The parts that hurt. The guy behind the breezy smile.
I play with my straw. "Your sister?"
"Yeah." His eyes go to the shiny silver table.
"What's the situation there?"
He looks to me and raises a brow. "The situation?"
"I don't need details." In theory. "You… you look upset. There's something there."
"Yeah." He leans back. Runs his hand through his hair. "I don't usually talk about it."
"You don't have to. But I… is there anything I can do?"
"I doubt it."
"My sister and I… we stopped talking a few years ago. We didn't really grow apart. We were close. Until we weren't."
"You got into a fight?"
"Yeah. A huge one. She asked me to make a choice, and I didn't make the one she wanted."
He tilts his head to one side. "That's vague."
