Page 355 of The First Time
Chapter Twenty-Six
We eat at a very expensive Thai fusion restaurant. It's pretentious. The decor is a mix of gold Buddha statues and photos of farmers in Thailand. Like any of them could afford the prices on the dinner menu.
I pick at my red curry. It's delicious. Fresh shrimp. Crispy vegetables. Fluffy rice.
But my tongue is apathetic.
Blake is sitting next to me, but he feels a million miles away. I'm not here. Not really.
I'm stuck in my head.
I'm trying to convince my feelings to recede. It's less than a month until our wedding. I can survive a month of pretending.
Blake brings a broccoli floret to his lips and bites off the head.
He has a perfect business way of eating. It's patient. Neat.
I suck iced tea through my straw. This place doesn't have a bar. But then that's better. I don't need anything clouding my judgment.
What is he thinking?
What goes on behind those gorgeous blue eyes?
He catches me watching and raises his brow. "Do you want to order something else?"
I stab a shrimp with my fork and eat it whole. "No."
"Ashleigh was concerned."
"About?"
"I'm not sure. I didn't ask her to spy."
I study his expression the way he studies mine. I'm sure there's more to see on my face.
Blake is still a mystery, but his concern is clear.
He does care about me.
"I don't really want to talk about it." I stab another shrimp and eat it whole.
He brushes the hair from my eyes. The same thing he did last time. It calms me.
It should be a crime for someone to be able to calm me down or wind me up as easily as he does.
He stares into my eyes. "Do it anyway."
"I always thought my wedding would be more… real."
He nods.
"And my parents… I always thought they'd be there." I stab a red pepper. "I miss them."
"I'm sorry."
"Lizzy… she thinks I'm stupid to let you push me around."
"Is that what I do?"
