Page 379 of The First Time
Chapter Thirty-One
The E.R. is an awful place. The air is stale. The tile is squeaky. The light is blindingly bright.
Fiona paces back and forth.
Lizzy sinks into the scratchy grey chair.
Blake leans against the wall, his eyes on his shiny leather shoes.
I press my palms into my thighs. What can I say? Meryl is dying. That isn't news. But now it isn't something far off in the future either.
Blake moves towards me. He kneels in front of me and looks up at me. His palm presses against my cheek.
He rubs my temple with his thumb.
"It will be okay." His voice is steady. Reassuring.
I believe him, even though it isn't true. It won't be okay.
She's going to die.
She's going to die believing this bullshit.
He wraps his arms around me.
I slide off the seat and sink into his touch. It's so strange, Blake on the E.R. floor in his thousand-dollar suit. Bringing himself to my level. Comforting me.
He does comfort me.
He does everything to me.
We sit like that forever.
Eventually, Lizzy stands. "I'm going to get a soda. You want anything?"
Yes, but nothing out of a vending machine. I shake my head.
"Come with me anyway." She offers her hand and shoots me awe need to talklook.
I take it. I let her pull me up and lead me away from Blake. Into a quiet hallway. One away from the sounds of emergencies and screaming patients.
Lizzy finds a vending machine in the corner and digs a dollar out of her purse. "You okay?"
I shake my head. "It feels like last time. Not as bad, but the same kinda thing. I lost almost everything that day."
My sister hugs me. "I don't want to fight. You're my best friend. Always. And whatever happens with Blake, I support you. Okay?"
"Okay."
"I love you."
"Love you too." I hug her tightly. "I'm going to miss you so much."
"You can visit anytime."
"I will." I release Lizzy and turn my attention to the vending machine. I'm not big on soda. Too sweet. And I don't need the caffeine. I'm wide awake as is. "You should go home. You have school."
"It's Saturday."
