Page 233 of The First Time

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I catch my breath, then I push myself up. Get back into my dress. Stuff my cell into my purse.

I'm not in control of this.

Not at all.

It's terrifying.

But it's thrilling too.

* * *

At ten the next morning,there's a loud knock on the door. I nearly drop the graphic novel in my hands. The slick plastic cover—the same on every other library book I've ever borrowed—is slippery.

Lizzy is at school.

Nobody comes by this early.

That must be Blake's assistant. With our paperwork.

I rise to my feet and move to the door. "Hello."

"Hello, Ms. Wilder. I have something for you."

I pull open the door.

A friendly man in a suit smiles at me. He hands over a sleek black briefcase. And a cup of coffee. "Mr. Sterling said you'd appreciate this."

Blake is sending me coffee.

From his assistant, but still.

I take a long sip. It's more bitter than I like it, but it's still good. Rich. Strong. Bold. Like him.

"Thank you." I nod goodbye and move back inside the house.

I fix my coffee with a little cream and sugar and take another sip. There. That's perfect.

I guess Blake did say he'd take care of me.

It's a strange thought. For the last three years, I haven't let anyone help me. I've been taking care of myself. And of Lizzy.

Half of me wants to let go of every ounce of that control.

The other half wants to hold onto it as tightly as I can.

I take another sip of my coffee. I let it warm me from inside out. I let it push my thoughts away.

This is coffee.

It doesn't have to mean more than coffee.

But what's in this briefcase—

The paperwork makes everything official.

A non-disclosure agreement forbids me from sharing details of our arrangement with anyone.

There's a credit card in my name. The bill goes right to Blake.

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