Page 35 of Breaking the Rules

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She had to deal with one asshole already.

I'm not adding to that.

No matter how desperate I am to know what happened.

To make Vinnie pay for whatever he did to scare her like this.

"All right," I say.

She stares into my eyes, assessing my intentions. She must not buy me dropping it, because she continues. "It really wasn't a big deal. Just awkwardness."

"I get it."

"We hooked up and it wasn't very fun and he didn't take the hint that I wasn't interested."

"It happens."

"It is what happened."

I nod. "All right."

"It is."

It's clearly not.

I want to know.

But I want to soothe her more.

I want to promise her everything is going to be okay.

I can't remember the last time I felt like that.

I'm not sure I've ever felt like that.

* * *

We makesmall talk as we finish packing. It's awkward. Tense. Filled with all the shit we're not saying.

She knows I don't believe her.

She knows I'm dropping it.

She doesn't trust my reasons.

When we get home, she practically runs to her room. Locks herself in it.

I give her some time to cool down, then I carry her red suitcase up the stairs. Knock on the door.

"Yeah?" The defensiveness drops from her voice. She isn't hard edges and locked walls. She's a scared, vulnerable girl who needs understanding.

I want to be the kind of guy who can offer that.

I want to be the person she needs.

"Your suitcase." There's something I need to say. Some way I make this better.

But I don't know what the fuck it is.

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