Page 23 of Breaking the Rules
"No." It's really not. "Everybody wants to be understood."
"And to understand someone else."
"Yeah."
"Why can't it always be this easy?" she asks.
"This is easy?" I finish another letter.
"Painful. But easy."
"It's the same with other people, isn't it?"
"Yeah, I guess it is. Simple. But painful." She bites her tongue.
"Halfway there."
"Thank God."
My laugh is soft.
Stephanie is sweet.
If things were different, if I was the kind of person who could handle intimacy—I'd run into her fucking arms.
But I'm not.
I can't.
I can barely handle this.
I bring up the band's first album.
Stephanie starts gushing about her favorite song.
I lose myself in finishing this work.
For the first time in forever, I'm on steady ground.
This is where I'm supposed to be.
What I'm supposed to do.
The reason why I need to hold my shit together.
For a while, I feel good. I check her out. Make it through my second client. Shoot the shit with Dean.
Then Emma steps into the store and shoots me that look that's equal partsleave me the fuck aloneandI want to see you naked again.
And the ground falls out from under me.
