Page 551 of Rock Me All Night
"I mean, you're no Pearl Jam, but you're solid," I tease.
He laughs. "Who's your favorite artist?"
"Amy Winehouse. Her songs were so raw, the way she'd put the ugly parts of herself in her lyrics. I wish I could do that."
"Most people can't."
"Are you good at it?" I pull back so I can look into his eyes. "At forgetting your plan and being in the music?"
"Better some days than others."
"I don't know if I can do that."
"You can." He runs a hand through my hair. His expression is attentive, curious. "Right now, there are things weighing on you. They're going to keep weighing on you as long as you keep running from them."
I swallow hard. It's disarming, how easily he sees through me.
"What are you running from?"
"The person everyone wants me to be."
"Who is she?"
"I don't know. But she's not me." I grab my soda and take a long sip. It's too sweet, too sticky. I barely know Pete. But I'm tired of bullshit. "She's an enabler."
"Who do you want to be?"
"Someone assertive. Who gets what she wants. Who doesn't let people push her around."
He leans in to whisper. His voice drops an octave. "Right now, what do you want?"
"To celebrate."
"Then let's cut the heavy shit." He nips at my ear. "What else?"
"Is this your thing—having sex in public?"
"Yeah."
"It's not a good idea for me. If I get caught, that will screw up my reputation. Lawyers don't get caught having sex in public."
"You want to wait until we go home?"
"No."
Again, he nips at my ear. "What do you want, Jess?"
"Are you going to make me say it?"
His voice drops. "You want to be assertive."
Damn. I did say that. I take a deep breath, allowing my eyelids to flutter closed. I move closer to him, so I can whisper. "I…" My cheeks flush. I can't say it yet. "I want to know why you chose me. You could have asked a million girls to do this and you asked me."
"Because you likeThe Hunger Games.And you wear sexy librarian glasses."
"Really?"
He presses his lips into my neck. "You haven't once tried to bullshit me or use me."
"Oh."
"If the answer to that question is all you want, I can move to the other side of the bench."
I can hear the smile in his voice. Okay. Deep breath. I can do this. I can ask for what I want. I bring my lips to his ear. "I want to fuck you."
