Page 95 of Rock Me All Night
20
He won't sharehimself with me but he's here, in my apartment, taking care of me, singing songs about me.
How the hell am I supposed to make sense of that?
I tug at the zipper of my hoodie and shrug it off my shoulders. "You want something to drink?"
"Whatever you're having."
"Do you drink?"
"Drink what?" He sets my bag on the counter.
"Alcohol."
"There's never been any alcohol in your fridge."
"There was none at your place in Malibu?"
His brow furrows. "You checked?"
"No, but am I wrong?"
"You're right. There's no alcohol there."
I look at the available beverages. It's green tea, water, or grapefruit juice. I pour two glasses of juice and hand one to Miles.
"Thanks." He takes a sip and sets the glass on the counter. It's a delicate movement. Careful.
"Do you drink?" I ask.
"No," he says. "You don't either."
"Why not?"
"I don't like the person it makes me." He moves into the kitchen. His eyes find mine. "I want to help you, Meg. I know what it's like to lose someone."
"I don't want to talk." I hold strong. This time, I'm the one who wants sex and he's the one who wants conversation. But it's not like he's offering to tear his heart out for me. It's still him withholding what I want. "I want to fuck you."
"I'm not your shiny distraction."
"You won't be my distraction. You won't share your secrets. What will you do?"
"Listen to you."
"Listen to me pour my heart out while you stay closed off?"
He says nothing. There's all this vulnerability in his eyes, but still, he says nothing.
I down my juice in one long gulp and place my cup in the sink. "I'm going to shower first."
"What makes you sure there will be a second?"
"If you're going to leave, lock the door behind you. Okay?"
I keep my eyes on his as I slip out of my shirt and pants. Miles watches with rapt attention. But he stays put. Even as I slide my bra off my shoulders and push my panties to my knees.
He grunts with approval but he doesn’t move.
