Page 122 of Rock Me All Night
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We takePacific Coast Highway south to a long, empty street that cuts through the hills. Everything is dark except for the stars and the moon.
I rest my eyes. It's late, and this day stretched on forever. Miles has my head spinning. I don't know which way is up or down. That's enough to drive me mad, but the house, my parents… it's like my sister never existed.
The car slows to a stop. We're at a red light. Miles has that same determined expression. He knows where we're going. He knows what he's doing. He knows exactly what he's getting out of this relationship.
He turns onto a steep, winding road. There's some kind of lab at the top of the hill. We stop just short of it to pull onto a large patch of dirt. It's a makeshift vista point.
Miles turns off the car. "Take a look."
We make our way to the edge of the hill. The quiet suburbs go on forever, this mass of twinkling lights. The black sky is dotted with stars I've never seen before.
"This was the closest thing we had to a make-out spot in high school," he says.
Miles lived in Irvine for a while. It’s only twenty minutes from here. Hell, UCI is barely fifteen minutes from my parents’ house.
It would make sense to go to school there. It would save me time, money, effort.
But it would hurt too.
I clear my throat. "Did you… come here a lot?"
"Yeah. But I was always alone."
My tense muscles relax. "Always?"
"Unless someone changed the definition of always so that it means sometimes."
I don't bother with a comeback. There's too much to take in. This place is beautiful, and I'm the first girl Miles has ever brought here. I try not to let it mean anything. My heart thuds against my chest.
I pull my arms over it to keep all the warmth in my body.
Miles slides his arm around my shoulders. "Cold?"
"Yeah."
"Come here." He slides into the backseat, pulling me with him.
His body is close to mine. Inches away. There's just enough light to make out the expression on his face. He looks sad. But I don't know what that means.
He's warm, and he smells good. I need that, need him comforting me.
His fingers skim my chin. He guides me into a kiss. It's soft and sweet, the kind of kiss that should meanI love you. But this one can't.
That's not possible.
I tug at his leather jacket. I need him closer. I need it to meanI love you.
When the kiss breaks, Miles stares into my eyes. "Are you okay?"
I shake my head. He shouldn't ask things like that. He shouldn't act so damn sweet.
"What is it?"
My lungs fail me. My vocal chords fail me. My mouth is sticky and confused. There's no easy way to explain this, but I want to try. "My parents… they erased my sister's existence from the house. It's not right."
"They're trying to cope."
