Page 9 of Sing for Me
"No." I've always been on the slim side, but since Rosie died, I'm all skin and bones. I feel awkward and gangly this far below my fighting weight.
"I'm not going to tell you to eat. I'm not going to ask you to smile. I remember when my dad died... that was the worst part."
I nod.
"But I'm not going to sit around while you disappear either." She takes the last sip from her can of tea and sets it in the recycling bin. "Come on. We're going out today. You don't have to enjoy it, but you do have to go."
My gaze goes to the window. The sun is already high in the bright blue sky. "Out there?"
She laughs. "Yes, out there."
"What's out there?"
"Sushi, boba, karaoke, cute stuffed alpacas."
"I'm listening."
"The Best Buy is within spitting distance. And I do want to..." She bites her lip. "No, I'll do that later."
"Huh?" Grief has made me a pretty shitty friend. But I can still pick up on the way her voice is wavering. Her eyes are getting dreamy. "Why would you ever want to go to Best Buy?"
"It's nothing."
I take my last clean, crisp sip and set my can next to hers. "It's something."
Her eyes light up with a realization. Her red lips curl into a smile. "I'll tell you if you go outside."
"To Best Buy?"
"That's nearly four blocks away. It would be asking a lot," she teases.
I nod.
"Let's start with boba."
"I can do that."
***
It's a nice day. Bright. Warm. Alive. The strip mall-style plaza down the street is packed. It takes forever to cross Sawtelle then it's a quick walk to my favorite boba place.
I haven't been to this particular shop in ages. The colors on the walls seem brighter. The cute signs are more grating. The citrus scene in the air is somehow sweeter and more sour at once.
Dammit, I'm a mess here. I'm desperate for school to finally start, but I'm not sure how I'm going to survive it.
I can barely leave the house for sugar and caffeine.
How am I going to make it through fall semester of my senior year?
How am I going to make it through med school applications?
Then, if I get in somewhere...
There's no way I'm going to make it through even a week of med school in this state. Forget about four years plus residency and specializing.
"No one would fault you for taking a semester off." Kara shifts her weight between her heels. She brushes a dark strand behind her ear. "Have you thought about that?"
"I can't lose momentum."
