Page 2 of Consultation with Dad's Best Friend
As a child, Kitty was the cutest and prettiest girl I’ve known, with her bright hazel eyes and curly brown hair. She was full of energy and often tired me out when I babysat her. Even at an early age, the girl liked to pretend to be adults, and not just adults, but knowledgeable experts. Her favorite game was to play experts such as teachers, scientists, and doctors. On her sixth birthday, John got her a toy medical kit, and for months she wouldn’t go anywhere without it. Naturally, everyone who visited their house became her patient. She even had a white coat to go with the role play. I still remember the advice she offered me when I told her I was experiencing a headache. After checking my blood pressure and listening to my heart and my lung, Kitty told me that I needed some milk. When I asked her why, she blinked and said with a blank face and an adult’s stern voice, “Because I’m the doctor, and I say so.”
It was all I could do not to laugh. But whenever I recall the incident, I can’t help chuckling. The funny thing is, over the years, I’ve been taking her advice. Whenever I have a headache, and it happens pretty often because of my line of work, I drink milk. Oddly it works.
Damn. That seemed to be not so long ago, and it was hard for me believe the Kitty I saw earlier was not a pretend adult but a real one.
But no matter, I promise myself. I’ll stay out of the house as long as possible. I have a housekeeper who cleans and cooks, so I don’t have to worry about Kitty so much. I’ll go home as late as I can, and that should give me less chance to act foolish.
Chapter 3
Kitty
Actually, I’m not that desperate to go to the beach. Like I said to Mike earlier, I’ve been to the beaches quite often, with my classmates and roommates. Besides, I have to work. I startedTalk to Cay,my website and chat line in my high school senior year, after successfully helping out a few girlfriends with their relationship problems.
Since then, I’ve helped quite a few girls that I’ve never met to decide what they are supposed to do with their boyfriends or unexpected pregnancies. Soon after I started college, I expanded it into an online business. I don’t charge callers, but I get paid from the ads. Not much, about twenty bucks a month, just enough for Blondie’s food.
I take my business seriously, though, mostly because I feel rewarded doing it, and it’s related to my major, which is psychology. I’m planning to become a family consultant one day. Now, my callers are not only high school or college students but also middle-aged people who seek advice on their marriages. I also have quite a lot of male callers.
Although sometimes I get weird calls, most of the time, the people who contact me really need help. My business hours are generally afternoons and evenings when I don’t have any class. Even though it’s now summer, I intend to keep the same schedule.
After Mike is out of the house, I feed Blondie and play with her for a while until she yawns and naps. I then turn on my computer, browse through my messages, and pick Daisy for a voice chat.
“Hi Daisy, how may I help you?”
“Hi Cay, thank you so much for talking to me. I don’t really know how to say this, but I’ve just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me. What am I supposed to do?”
Well, I get this a lot. When I first started, I always told the girls to ditch the dickhead, but few people ever took my advice. Soon I figured if a girl asked around for help in such cases, most likely it was because she didn’t want to leave the guy, even though he might be an asshole. So I came up with a better solution. Here is what I say to Daisy. “What do you do to turn him on?”
“W-what?” Daisy sounds abhorred.
“Daisy. I’m trying to help you to win him back. Isn’t that what you want?”
“Um… yes.”
“So what do you do during foreplay?”
“We…err, kiss… and touch each other.”
“Where do you touch him exactly?”
Daisy giggles a bit. “Well… his… err… you know what.”
“His penis?”
“Yeah. Where else should I touch?”
This is exactly the question I expected. Ninety-nine percent of the girls like foreplay, and ninety-nine percent of them don’t know how to foreplay back.
“No, don’t go for his you-know-what right away. Kiss his neck and his earlobes first. You can also massage him, even scratch him a bit. Strip for him and touch yourself for him.”
“This sounds so slutty,” Daisy says.
“Well, believe it or not, Daisy. Men like it. The girl who your boyfriend sees probably does it for him. You can hand him over to her if you don’t want to do it.”
“Okay, I’ll give it a try. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. I hope it helps.”
From what you’ve seen so far, you might think I’m a slut or at least sexually experienced. But believe it or not, I’ve never even had a boyfriend! I’ve only kissed a couple of guys in high school.
