Page 43 of Hidden Sacrifice
“She needs you together. All of you,” he said, looking at each of us before settling his gaze on me hardest. It felt like a bucket full of tiny needles was dropped on my head, stabbing me like a wave.
The trip back to Hell was silent, and I appreciated the space. But looking at the cabin in front of me, the chimney pillowing out white puffs of smoke that disappeared into the sky above, I felt overwhelmed and needed more space.
“I need to go for a while,” I muttered as the others walked.
“Wait,” Mor said, stopping and turning back towards me. “Can I help?”
My mind flipped through the times we had been together, alone from the rest of the demon world. She made me want to push my boundaries, and I wasn’t sure if that would help or not right now.
“He said she needs us together. I get that we just had some heavy shit dumped on us today, but we should try to work on this together. It’s bigger than just us,” Jace said, having stopped and decided to join the conversation uninvited.
“Go into the cabin and stay there till I am gone,” I ordered, sending the command through the spell linking us. A slight smile stretched across my face as I watched him turn and head into the cabin.
“He was just trying to help,” Mor said softly, slowly walking closer to where my feet seemed rooted into the ground. “But he’s also right. You aren’t alone; you are part of this pack. Pack means relying on each other and allowing the others to carry some weight for you. We are letting you know that we are here for you when you are ready to let us in.” Her hand reached out for a moment before retracting it. “The doorway will be open; just let me know where and I will be there.”
I nodded sharply before turning and heading for a portal to take me to my gallery.
* * *
“I’m in my gallery,”I sent out when I was finally sure I was ready to do this. The words that were spoken to me today bounced around in my mind. It was practically deafening.
The angel had said it himself; my soul was incomplete. No matter how hard I tried, I would always be a failure because my fucking soul was missing parts of itself. I wasn’t even a whole demon; how could I be enough as a mate. And I wasn’t enough, as the angel also so plainly said. She needed all of me, and I didn’t have all of me.
I knew I shouldn’t have taken a mate.
I heard the door click as the latch disengaged. The soft pad of her bare feet on the floor echoed around the otherwise silent room. I watched her from the top balcony as she walked into my space wearing nothing more than a sheer white gown that billowed around her ankles as she went. Her pale white skin looked like a drop of cream against an ocean of snow.
She slowed, looking up and spotting me as I leaned against the hand-carved railing looking down at her with a smile. A smile had formed the moment I saw her, whether I wanted it to or not. I quickly fixed my face into a more passive expression as I watched her pick up the skirt of her dress as she began to ascend the stairs. Once she set me in her sights, her gaze never strayed.
I wanted her so fucking badly.
She came to stand next to me as I still leaned against the balcony, only my head turned towards her. She smiled at me before mirroring my stance. Her eyes glanced down below us to where the piano sat.
I couldn’t get the images of her tied to the piano out of my head. So, I let them replay in my mind while she stood so close to me I could smell her. All that did was heighten the memories until I could practically taste her on my tongue again. My grip on the balcony tightened as I tried to regain control.
“Yeah, I can’t stop thinking about that night either,” Mor said, turning her head to me and smiling. “You sent me,” she said, pointing to her head.
“Sorry,” I said, redoubling my efforts to control my mind and my power.
“I don’t want you to be sorry about that. I enjoyed myself, and I would like to think you did too.” Her grip on the balcony tightened, and I wondered what made her tense.
“It’s a perfect memory, Babe,” I said with a smile, hopefully reassuring her that I enjoyed myself a great deal that night.
“Then why the this,” she said, straightening to gesture to all of me with her hand.
“Why the this? You realize that isn’t even a sentence, right.” I straightened and turned, that pesky little smile threatening to poke out again. I took a deep, steadying breath; this was for her. She needed this. “All my life, I have been different. Different than other demons. Defective,” I started, having run this conversation through my mind dozens of times as I worked out what I needed to say to her since we got back from the angel realm.
She stood there, patiently waiting for me to decide when to continue.
“My father is obsessed with power. He took my mother as a wife because of her power. When I was born, my father was delighted with how much power I should have. But as I grew, it didn’t take long for my father and mother to notice something was off. My first ability, telekinesis, didn’t start to show until after my first decade.”
Mor nodded as she followed along, but I knew she didn’t understand.
“Most demons begin to show their first ability before they can walk,” I added, realizing I would have to put more effort into my explanation.
“Oh, I see,” she said lightly.
“My father became more and more furious as I got older. He started using his powers on me to elicit a response. To help me come into my power,” I added as her face contorted into a look of horror.
