Page 44 of Inflame Me
“Rhys said we needed to stay in town for a while.”
“Yeah. It’s best.” I look down to the floor. What in the fuck am I doing?
“Cam—Dagger?” I close my eyes; my real name causes an ache that only she could give me. “Please look at me.” I look up as she tries to move to sit up. Her face contorts in pain, and I move quickly to her side, lifting her up and moving her to sit up in the bed. “Thank you.” She pats the bed. “Sit. I think we need to talk.”
Talk. Fucking hell.
“Yeah, guess we do.”
Damn those eyes. They are exactly the same, but behind them is so much hurt. All I want to do is scrub every bit of it away.
“You have a daughter,” she says quietly.
I give a soft chuckle. “Yeah, I guess I do.” I run my fingers over my beard. “Why didn’t you tell me, Mear?”
She looks up to the ceiling like it will give her answers or some shit. “I wanted to. God, I wanted to.” Her eyes come back to mine. “So many times, I picked up the phone and dialed then hung up.” Her soft laugh reminds me of better times. Still love that sound. “I wanted to. I wanted to just come back and be with you.”
“Then why didn’t you?”
Her eyes drop to her hands that are laced in front of her. “I saw what this life consisted of. Women were everywhere, wearing nothing but scraps of fabric and hanging on to your every word like it was gold. I didn’t belong here.”
“I never once cheated on you, Mearna. You can’t throw that shit in my face,” I growl, feeling the anger begin to burn.
“I actually trust that.” She bows her head. “I wasn’t pretty like them. I didn’t have the huge boobs or hair out to here.” Her arms come out to her sides of her head, demonstrating. “I didn’t speak the language that you were beginning to take on. I was an outsider. That is why I left.”
“Mear, that’s fucking bullshit, and you damn well know it. You left because you were scared.”
“I …” I hold up my hand, not wanting to hear the words she’s going to say.
“You know you were the only woman for me. None of those bitches meant shit. I didn’t fuck a single one of them, and I had a shit load of opportunities to, Mear—don’t get me wrong. But I fucking kept my dick in my pants and came home to you every night.”
“I know,” she whispers.
“Then why’d you leave?”
She rests her head back on the headboard. “I didn’t think we had a future. You were so enthralled with the club and going on runs or whatever. I felt like I didn’t matter, that you didn’t love me enough to pick me over the club.”
And the truth finally comes out.
“Was that shit so hard to say?”
Her head pops up, and she gives me an icy stare. Fuck, I missed that shit, too.
“It’s true—the club comes first—but that doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t protect you and keep you safe until my dying breath,” I tell her in all sincerity.
A tear falls from her right eye and travels down her cheek, falling to the sheets. “It would have never worked. I was so young.”
“You were young, but that’s no reason to assume it wouldn’t work,” I fire back.
“I saw one of the ol’ ladies get slapped across the face,” she says quietly. “I didn’t want to end up like that.”
“I don’t know what that situation was, but I never gave you the impression that I’d hit you, Mear. That shit belongs to the asshole that’s dead right now.” Her body shakes as more tears fall. “So why not tell me about the baby?”
“All you would have said to me was ‘Mearna, come back,’ and I would have. I was so lost without you. I wanted you so badly. I was terrified about having a baby on my own. As much as I wanted to come back to you, I knew, after I found out I was pregnant, there was no way. I couldn’t expose a baby to this.” She moves her hand through the air. “I cried all the time. Sometimes I didn’t stop for days, just aching to be with you.”
Aw, fuck it. I move to the other side of the bed, kick off my boots, and climb in. I pull Mearna into my arms and hold her as the sobs rake over her.
“You’re right. I would have come and gotten you and brought you back. I would have taken care of you and Tanner.”
