Page 27 of Bound by Wreckage
“Well my tour guide only stopped for gas station goodies.”
His chuckle warms me in a way that fills my soul. It’s pure, true, and honest. There is no hidden meaning or somepuzzle I have to figure out. The sound is untainted with any part of my past.
“Hey, you loved that roller dog.”
A smile lifts my face. “I was hungry.” We empty the bags filled with clothes, toiletries, and food. “Do I want to know how you knew my size for clothes?”
“You left them on the floor. Looked at the tags.”
“Oh.” That’s a completely reasonable explanation. “Thankyou, Nox. It’s all great.”
“No, it’s not, but it’ll get you through the next few days. Come sit and let’s eat.”
He sets the bag of hot food on the table and begins pulling things out. We sit in comfortable silence while we eat. Nothing with Buck was ever comfortable. Hell, whenever he was quiet usually didn’t bode well for me in any way, shape, or form. With Nox, that fear isn’tanywhere in sight. Not once has the thought of him attacking me or hurting me entered my mind. If anything, the words protection and safe are on the forefront.
“Do you like being in your club?” I ask, finishing my last bit of chicken and mashed potatoes. Admitting nervousness isn’t going to happen, but it’s there hovering at the surface. Conversation hasn’t been in my vocabulary for nineyears. Being told to be seen and not heard cuts a woman at the throat.
He wipes his mouth and beard with a napkin, tossing it to the table. “Love it. It’s my life, my family. It’s all I’ve ever known.”
Thinking back, Buck is all I’ve known for so long; am I destined to never let that go? The way Nox talks it’s a prominent thing, and that fills me with dread. Experiencing the Rangerslifestyle for so many years and now spending time with Nox are two totally different things. Where Buck is demanding. Nox is patient. Where Buck is cruel. Nox appears kind. They are complete opposites, and I wonder if their clubs are as well.
“What brought on that face?”
Chewing my bottom lip, the words fly, “I’ve been with Buck for nine years. It’s all I’ve ever known during thattime. Does that mean I’m going to feel like this the rest of my life?”
Nox moves quickly, kneeling on the floor in front of me and grabbing my hands. “No. Your life should’ve never been like this. You deserve so much more, Carsyn. Saw it when we were freshman and see it now. Will you be able to forget, probably not, but you will be able to move on and create a life for yourself away fromhim.”
“He’s going to find me.” The biggest fear in me comes tumbling out, and my body shakes.
“No, he’s not.” He says it with determination, but I know he can’t stay here with me and protect me. I’m going to have to do that on my own. “I have a plan. Just trust me.”
“You’re the only one on this planet I do trust, Nox.”
His face is only a foot from mine, and this incredibleurge to kiss him rides me hard. I feel myself leaning, then he retreats back. Shame hits me in the head.
Why would he want to kiss a woman like me? Damaged, pathetic, drowning. I’ll never be a woman deserving of those lips on mine.
Needing to escape and gather myself, I rise. “I’m going to take a shower.”
He stands as well as I rummage through the clothes. Finding some thatlook decent, I grab the bag of toiletries.
“Thought you said it would hurt worse if you showered.”
Yeah. I did say that and it’s true, but I need a break. “I’ve had time to rest, and I want to get that place off of me.” It’s not a lie by any stretch of the imagination. I do want to, and omitting something isn’t lying.
“Okay,” he says to my back as I close the door to the bathroom.
Looking in the mirror, tears well in my eyes. My cheeks are sunken in, and deep bags frame my eyes. My hair is the worst of all, and if I had a scissors I’d cut it all off.
A knock comes to the door, and I jump. “Yes?”
“I bought you some hair dye.”
“You did?” I open the door, and he hands me a box with a dark-haired woman on the front. Damn that was thoughtful. “Thankyou.”
“Whatever you need, Carsyn.”
On a nod, I shut the door and get busy changing myself back to me, whoever the hell that is. I need to find her.
