Page 40 of Needing to Fall
“Do you want him to go with you?” she mumbled, tipping her head in the direction of Lynx. It was cute and almost funny, but I didn’t laugh.
“I know this is sudden and different, but yes, I want Lynx with me.”
A look of defeat fluttered across her eyes, tugging at my heart. I didn’t understand it. Was she upset that I wasn’t taking her?
I stepped close to Andi, sucking in deeply before I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her to my body. She rested her head on my shoulder, reciprocating the hug.
“I worry about you,” she said in my hair.
“I know. I’m going to be fine. I’m hoping”—damn, I said the H-word—“that this will make things better for me … Help me understand better.”
“I know,” she whispered back, retreating from my embrace. “Be careful,” she said into my eyes then turned to Lynx. “If anything happens to her, I hold you responsible.” Her tone totally changed when she addressed Lynx, making the hairs on the back of my head stand up in surprise.
“I’d never let anything happen to her,” Lynx said.
***
After giving Lynx the address and climbing up in his monster of a truck—I kid you not, it was huge, like having to lift my knee so high it touched my chest just to get in huge—the ride to the address was quiet. I was pretty sure Lynx was trying to give me some space after what had happened with Andi, and I appreciated that. I liked how he knew when to give me time to process things.
The drive seemed to go on for hours. Lynx would stop, and we would use the restrooms, grab something to eat, and then head back out. It sucked, though, because Andi forced money into my pocket before I left. I felt like a heel having to use it and not having my own. The feeling burned me. Still, I knew that no matter what, I was paying her back every last cent. Lynx gave me space on that, too, not demanding he pay or making me feel any shittier than I already did.
“We’re about an hour out,” he said, still facing the windshield. He had a profile I was sure women would swoon over: a strong jaw and nose with bowed lips that looked so damn soft. Even the scar he had didn’t take away from the beauty that was this man. I wanted to ask him how he got it yet refrained. It wasn’t my place. If he wanted to tell me, he would.
“Okay,” I replied.
“You ready to talk to me yet?” He glanced my way, his face a mix of concern and something else I couldn’t put my finger on.
I huffed out, “What do you want to talk about?”
“Want to first explain to me what your relationship with Andi is?”
That question caught me off guard. We had talked about Andi before. He knew she was my best friend; therefore, I didn’t know where he was going with this.
“Sorry?”
“Are you two dating? Have you been together?”
I gasped, my stomach doing a triple summersault at the thought of it. Why on earth would he think this?
Chills raced down my arms as the memories of earlier flitted in my head. Her look of disappointment, the shadow that had crossed over her eyes, the way she had snapped at Lynx…
Holy shit. He couldn’t be right, could he?
Lynx ginned. “I can tell by your deer-in-the-headlights look that you didn’t suspect a thing.”
I had to shut my mouth because my jaw dropped open. I hadn’t. How could I have missed something like that? As soon as I thought it, I knew the answer. I was so caught up in my own head I didn’t see what was right in front of me.
“Oh, shit,” I said softly, covering my mouth with my hand. “I didn’t…” I couldn’t say anything more. This could change everything between me and Andi, and I couldn’t lose her.
“I get that you didn’t, but a blind man could tell she loves you.”
Shit. Shit. Shit.She loves me? Like that? My head spun as this tumbled around in a kaleidoscope of colors so vivid they were almost blinding.
With athunk, I rested my head against the headrest, fully taking all of it in. First, I had closed off that part of me for so long that, not until Lynx, had any rumblings or tingles come to me. Second, she was my best friend, and if this were true, she could get mad that I didn’t reciprocate those feelings.
She was beautiful—don’t get me wrong—but I had never once thought of her as anything more than a friend, a best friend whom I cared deeply for, who had been there for me, stuck by me like no one else had. She had never elicited those tingles or feelings inside of me. I almost felt guilty for not feeling the same way because I could hurt her badly. No, this couldn’t be happening. It just couldn’t.
“Babe, I didn’t mean to dump this shit on you, but you two are gonna need to have a talk.”
