Page 51 of Bound by Vengeance
He leans back in his seat. “I reserve the right to break the rule if it means helping you.”
“No. That’s not going to work.”
He leans into the table, his elbows on it, his face close to mine. “It has to work because I’ll do whatever I have to, to keep you safe. I’ll break anyone who stands in my way of it. You will be safe, and you will be loved. There’s no question about that in my eyes.”
While what he said was sweet, it also pisses me off.
I clasp my hands in front of me, lacing my fingers together so I don’t scratch his eyeballs out. “So, you’ll tell the club everything I tell you?”
“You’re not listening. I said I’ll do whatever I have to, to protect you. If that means pushing something like the other night, then so be it. It doesn’t mean I’ll go to the club, or anyone for that matter, and talk about private things. There’s a huge fuckin’
difference there.”
“How am I supposed to trust you, Ryker?” That’s the biggest thing right now, and it kills that I don’t. Before, I trusted him enough to touch me and make me come several times. I’ve trusted no other man to do that ever. I gave him that part of me, which is really the only thing I have to give—me.
Ryker loves you, Austyn. Emery’s words ring in my head, making my heart crack. This is why I need to stay away from this man. I knew the friend thing wouldn’t work. My feelings for him are too strong, and having him around me all the time only reinforces them. It’s too difficult to keep them at bay.
Part of me wants to tell him why I had to get rid of my baby. That way, he’ll know and won’t want anything to do with me.
I’ll be done with all this. I can focus on JK without Ryker clouding up my thoughts all the time, knowing he’ll disappear without a glance back.
“I’m going to ask Dad to assign me a new bodyguard.”
Ryker’s jaw drops, and it takes him a moment to respond. “No fuckin’ way. I fucked up, but you’re not gonna push me away. You’re not dirty. You’re fuckin’ beautiful, and I’ll make sure you know it.”
I shake my head. “This is too hard for me.” The words escape before I want them to.
“Being around me is too hard? Why is that, Austyn? Because you have feelings for me and you’re fighting them?”
“No.” The denial is immediate.
His voice dips low, almost threatening. “Don’t lie to me, Austyn.”
“Don’t you get this? It can never work between you and me.”
“It has been for the last few weeks,” he counters without hesitation.
He has me there. Despite the hiccup the other night, things have been going well. Too well.
“I can’t just wipe it away and pretend the other night didn’t happen.”
“Stop deflecting.”
I stomp my foot in frustration right as the waitress brings our food out, placing our plates in front of each of us, then leaves.
“Can we just eat and talk about this again … never?”
“When we get home.” He takes a bite of his burger.
This discussion is going to rip me apart.
Can’t he see my resolve is broken? Can’t he feel the pain this causes me?
I study Ryker. His eyes meet mine. Confusion laces with my determination.
He wants to help me.
Emery once again plays in my mind. Ryker loves you.
