Page 17 of Bound by Vengeance
It was sick. It made me feel like the slimeball that is my father. I fought it, pushing it down. No matter how she looked at me, I kept it in the no-go zone and continued to do that for years. Then her getting hurt tweaked something inside me. Made me want and crave and desire in a way I never thought possible. Suddenly, all the things holding me back didn’t seem the same.
Protecting and taking care of her suddenly became top priority.
Now, judging from her expression, she looks as if she’s closed that door on us. It’ll be my job to open it back up.
Thinking back to what Green said, work will need to be seriously done.
“We’re just talking, Austyn.”
“You just kissed me!” Fire breathes life into her, and her cheeks warm.
My cock instantly gets hard, and I have to will him down.
Reaching out, I grasp the side of her face, swiping my thumb over her bottom lip. Thoughts arise of what they will look like after my cock is deep inside them or when I’ve kissed her so much they’re swollen.
“Do it again in a heartbeat.” The truth flows from my lips. There is no other way with me. I say what I mean and mean what I say; that’s how it’s always been, and there is no reason to have qualms about that.
“That’s not just talking.”
She’s right, and if I don’t calm my shit, she’s going to leave and do it fast.
Taking a step back, I tell her, “You’re right. Let’s talk. No more lips involved.”
Her shoulders droop just enough to show me her disappointment, then rise again.
I love all her small tells. When she’s nervous, she picks at the skin around her thumb. When she’s excited, her little dimple that, if you don’t know it’s there, you’d miss it, makes its appearance. Needless to say, I may not have been going for her, but my eyes were watching. The reason I waited is still up in the air, because I have no fucking clue. I told myself it’s because of my past. Only, the more I look in the mirror at the man I am today, the more I know nothing of my history touches me.
“There isn’t anything to talk about, Ryker.”
Placing my hands in my pockets, giving off a relaxed vibe, I say, “I just want to know how you’re really doing. None of that ‘good’ bullshit because, when you looked left while saying it, I could tell you were lying.”
When she gasps, I smile inside. She thinks I don’t know her, but I do. Maybe even better than herself.
“I wasn’t lying.” As her eyes dart left, she catches herself. This time, the chuckle escapes me.
“Right. Let’s just sit in your car and talk. No pressure.”
Her eyes narrow and her face reddens. “You think you know me, but I’ve got news for you—you don’t know shit.”
“Calm down, woman.” I place my hands on her shoulders, getting closer to her, and her body stills at my touch like it’s affecting her in some way.
Something in my gut tells me that I need to go slow with Austyn. Not only is it what happened with JK, but there is something else she’s skittish about. I make a decision, following what Green told me.
“We’re friends. Been friends for a long fuckin’ time. This is just two friends catching up.”
She huffs out a breath, and just as I’m about to take it as my cue, she says, “Fine. Ten minutes.” Her body gives her away, but her eyes show her fight against this, against me.
Challenge accepted.
My smile is wide. I should kiss her again, but I don’t.
Slow. Fuck, I’ve never done slow once in my whole damn life, yet here I am, trying it with Austyn. The one who actually matters. The one I give a shit about.
Sliding into the passenger seat, I see her grip the steering wheel so tight her knuckles are stretched white. It’s hot, just like all the other things she does that makes her that way.
“Rumor is you got your own place.” Starting off light is the only choice. Jumping in with I-want-you-under-me-now is crossing the friend line, something she’s not ready for.
Her chest decompresses as she continues to look out the window, making it a point not to give me her attention. That’s alright; we can play this.
