Page 58 of Blood & Loyalties
“Damn, Dad. I wanted to play.” Val picked up his tools, placing them back in the boxes.
Sal ignored him. “Jag, I’m sorry about what happened with your father. Son, I know your father’s death was hard, but you can’t allow it to cloud your judgment.”
I nodded, feeling exactly like what Zan had called me—an idiot.
“It won’t.” I said those words with every bit of certainty I could muster.
“Get out of here and get a shower before you head back.”
Now was as good a time as any. I had been trying to figure out when I was going to tell them I wasn’t going back, and he had just given me an opening.
“I’m not going back. I’m staying here with Catarina.”
Sal pulled back at my words, crossing his arms over his chest. “Last I heard, she wasn’t speaking with you, no.”
“It’s been a while, but that won’t stop me.” I held strong, knowing Sal would take me out if I fucked her over, but all I intended on doing was fucking her stupid and opening her eyes to what we could have.
“I didn’t think it would. She’s been edgy lately, but puts on a good show. Maybe you can find out what’s going on with my girl.” His words struck me. She was the one who had cut it off, so I had figured she would be fine, happy. Even Kiera didn’t let on to any of this.
“I will.”
Chapter Fourteen
I DIDN’T SLEEPfor shit after that fucking note. Kiera was seriously thinking of committing me. That morning, I had it out with the coffee pot. For some reason, it didn’t want to brew fast enough for me, so I threw it to the floor, shattering glass everywhere.
After hearing the combustion of glass on the tile, I slid down to the floor. The glass lay there like all the broken pieces of me, scattered everywhere. Each piece was a representation of how everything I held dear could be destroyed in an instant.
I laid my hand on the floor, only to cut myself and watch the blood trickle, each drop cementing the knots inside. I couldn’t take it much longer. I was stronger than this, but add my family into the mix, and helplessness was turning me into someone I hated to even be around.
Work that morning sucked six ways to Sunday. A client called me, giving me an earful about his damn money. I swore I was going to unleash a side of me soon that would have him backing the fuck off really quickly.
Everything I seemed to touch throughout the day broke or fell to the ground the instant it made contact with me. I broke two drawers in my desk. Two. Then I decided, since they were already broken, I might as well slam them a few times and really break them. It didn’t settle the anger bubbling inside. If anything, it helped fuel it. This war inside of me was tearing me down day by day.
As I sat in my office, I rested my elbows on top of the desk and sunk my hands into my hair as I looked down at it, the shiny wood staring back at me. My internal struggles were beating me into submission.
My phone buzzed then, causing me to jump, and I answered quickly. “Yes.”
“You have a delivery.”
I rolled my eyes at my assistant Molly as she spoke. She knew better than this.
“Don’t I always? Sign for it.”
She coughed. “Ms. Lambardoni, it has a specification for you to sign.”
Anger bubbled. I didn’t want to get the fuck up, nor did I give a shit about a delivery.
“Fine. I’ll be right out.” I slammed the phone down and raked my fingers through my wayward hair.
I stopped at the mirror on the wall, freezing in my tracks. The woman staring back at me couldn’t be me. The circles around my eyes and the vacant look inside of them was haunting. Shit. I grabbed my bag, pulling out my makeup then applying it as best I could. I didn’t want anyone to know the ghosts that hid behind the shadows. It was best to hide them as much as possible.
After one last look, I opened the door and came to an immediate halt. Red, white, and pink roses, hundreds of them, lined the counter spaces, the scent immediately invading my nostrils and causing a small lift to my lip. Standing next to Molly’s desk was what I assumed was a man judging from the jeans and boots. The upper half of his body was hidden by numerous long-stemmed roses that he held in his hand.
As I stepped closer, the hairs on the back of my neck prickled and goose bumps rose on my arms. Jag. He was here. I could feel him.
While inside I was jumping erratically up and down with excitement, I stood rooted in place.
I looked over at Molly who had a sheepish grin on her face. She knew exactly what she was doing.
