Page 16 of The Alpha's Arrangement
Pulling up my big girl panties, I take a huge breath and slowly let it go. I gravitate toward Carter’s strength and feed off it, knowing he’ll lead me.
Carter must sense this because he says, “Good girl,” just as the wolves get closer.
My brown wolf sniffs the air then hunches down on his belly, coming closer a little at a time until his head is mere inches from me.
I reach out and pet his fur. “Hey, bud. How’ve you been?”
One by one, the other wolves do the same. Each of them go down on their bellies and each lay their heads down on the grass.
“You’re right,” I say softly to Carter.
“Yes. They like you, and you like them.”
For the rest of the afternoon, I watch as the wolves play together. There is growling and biting, but it’s not ever angry. It’s comradery, a family. Sometimes, one will run off while a couple of others chase it and bring it back to the group. Other times, they will find rabbits or some other small animals and chase them. I thought for sure that one of them would eat what they caught, but surprisingly, they didn’t. It’s as if they want me to like them and are afraid that, if they did so, I’d be scared. Truth is, I want them to. I want to see them be natural and do what they normally do, so when I say, “Get ’em, boy!” it turns into a chase with several little bunnies not making it. Not that I’m a fan of killing rabbits, but it’s what wolves do. I wouldn’t want them to come in and dictate how I live my life, so why would I do that to them?
Each wolf takes their turn coming up to Carter and I, allowing me to pet their heads. Some even lick me, which I take as a good sign.
The entire time, Carter stays by me. We talk, laugh, and have an overall wonderful time. One that I will cherish forever.
When I ask if we can come back, he readily agrees.
When we leave, several of the wolves whine, and I swear I see some tears forming in a couple of their eyes. Not that that’s possible. Is it?
That night, Carter’s family comes over once again. It feels right. It feels like home. Carter feels like home.
When they leave, I curl up against Carter for the night and don’t wake up once. Not even to see my wolf.
CHAPTER NINE
FOR FIVE DAYS STRAIGHT, CARTER AND I GET UP AND GO TO THE FIELDS. AND I FIND MYSELF putting off calling the attorneys and realtor, wanting to spend more time with Carter.
Everything is perfect—going to the fields, coming home and having dinner, then going to bed in Carter’s arms. The only thing that can be better is if Carter took the step to have sex with me. We fool around and each get off, but he’s holding back. Every time his veins pop out on his neck and muscles strain, it kills me, but I don’t know why he is. It’s something we need to talk about. That’s what I set out to do over breakfast.
Making my way down stairs, the smell of bacon frying has my stomach growling. One thing about Carter is, the man can cook, and boy, does he eat.
As we sit at the table, I ask, “Why do you hold back on me?” I don’t want to be that self-conscious woman, but it unfortunately is a bit hard. I’m practically throwing myself at him, yet he refrains. I know I’m not hard on the eyes, but Carter is drop dead gorgeous with a personality to match. He could have anyone. Anyone. So, why me and why hold back that part of himself?
“What do you mean?” he responds, popping a piece of bacon in his mouth.
I push my plate back and rest my elbows on the table. “We kiss, we touch, but you don’t take it any further. Why? What’s wrong?”
He rises from the table, scoops me up bridal-style, and moves us to the couch where he sits me on his lap. “Nothing’s wrong.”
“But you …” I start, but he places his finger over my lips, stopping me.
“Let me finish.”
I nod, and he removes his finger.
“I need to know you’re ready to hear me and be open to everything I say.”
A pit begins to form in my stomach at the uncertainty his words leave behind. Not him; he’s very certain. For me. Am I ready to know whatever this is that’s implied in his words?
My feelings for this man are growing each day we’re together. Simple touches he gives me while walking by me in the kitchen send my heart aflutter. If this is a barrier between us, then I want to know. I want to figure out if what we have is just lust or if it’s something that’s buildable, lasting.
“I’m open.”
He kisses me softly on the lips. “When we get to the field today, I’ll tell you everything. You trust me, right?”
