Page 41 of Only for Him

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I’m not alone anywhere.

He’s always watching. I consider giving him the finger but then I’ll have a hard time explainingthatto Teddy.

“It’s nothing,” I shove the phone in my pocket, wishing I can somehow break the screen in the process.

Everything tightens and swells. My heart starts racing. A bead of sweat trickles down my ribs. My nipples tighten as disgust and fear and desire war for dominance in my head.

He tilts his head. “You sure?”

“I’ll be fine.” I shrug. “Part of the job.”

He doesn’t buy it, but he lets it go. Then, he says, “Can I ask you something?”

“Shoot.”

He hesitates, and then: “You want to get a drink after work? Catch up with an old friend?”

The urge to say yes is immediate and stupid. I should say no, obviously. My phone vibrates again, a fresh burst of anger in my pocket.

I know it’s another message from my stalker telling me to turn Teddy down. I don’t have to check to know that.

I shouldn’t need to second-guess getting reacquainted with an old friend. Teddy always understood me in a way few others did. Maybe not as well as my blue-eyed shadow does, but I don’twantanyone to know me as well as that.

I’ve been hiding that version of myself from everyone for a reason. I barely like seeing it myself.

Hedoesn’t get to tell me what to do, how to do it, or who I get to do it as.

“Sure,” I say, and the word is out before I can stuff it back in.

Teddy grins.

My phone buzzes a third time, this one a little longer, a little more insistent. Is he fuckingcallingme right now?

“Great! I need to run back to the field office.” Teddy checks his watch. “You still have the same number?”

He sounds tentative, as if waiting for me to back out.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll give you a call after work.” He smiles. “It’s good to see you again, Giselle.”

“Same,” I say, but my voice cracks.

Only when he’s completely out of sight do I dare to pull out my phone.

Turns out my stalkerwasn’tcalling me. He was just firing off so many messages, each one angrier than the one before.

But the final one stops my heart cold.

I’ll make you pay for that, little viper.

And then, I look up at security camera in the corner watching everything and stick up my middle finger.

Teddy is already waitingfor me by the time I get to the bar in Inwood.

I spot him at the corner table, his jacket thrown over the back of his chair and the sleeves of his shirt rolled to the elbow.

He waves when he sees me, and it’s a gesture too open for this city, a flare against the skyline of people who don’t want to be seen.