Page 21 of Forgive Me Father
“Sure.”
He enters the room, turning to quietly shut the door until it meets the frame. As he turns back to me and makes his way to where I'm sitting, I notice how exhausted he looks. He runs his hands through his hair as he takes a seat beside me on the bed.
"Did talking to Father Briar take that much energy out of you-"
"Dad's hurting me," Aiden blurts out, the compulsion to goad him about today’s events dies out completely the moment those words leave his mouth.
Staring at Aiden, I swallow nothing, my hand clutching my phone.
"What do you mean-"
"You remember how it was growing up? Yea, you got your share of shit, but you were always their favorite, and I could never do anything to please them," He says, his head bowed as he speaks. "Dad was always keen on using that damn belt on you, but when he took me into his room for my punishments, I never saw the belt," Aiden sobs, a million thoughts running through my mind. "I would have fucking loved for it to have been the belt."
"Aiden-"
"When you went away, I had an opportunity to please him to the point he felt that his punishments weren’t needed anymore. Then you came home, and for some reason, he never felt the need to take his frustrations out on you like he used to. Once again, I was his outlet when he was angry. I don't hate you, Eden. I envy the fact he never went after you the same way he comes after me. I hate myself for expecting you to have done something about a problem you didn't even know about. I thought that you fucking up would make his focus go somewhere else. I was wrong," Aiden continues, tears dropping from his jaw and blotching his jeans.
I rub his back, but he flinches and jerks away.
"If he isn't using the belt, Aiden, what is he-"
"Kids," My father snaps, both of us jolting at the sound.
Nudging the door all the way open, he stands with his belt in hand. My mother lingers behind him, a sheen over her dilated eyes, not doubt from the handful of Xanax she’d probably taken after dinner.
"Aiden, let's go," He urges. "Morgan, you go enjoy your shows. Eden, get some rest-"
"No," I snap, standing in between my father and Aiden, staring him down.
"He’s already apologized and confessed. We are far too old for physical punishment, Dad," I hiss. "Aiden is-"
My mother gasps as my father’s hand coils around my neck. He uses his body to force me back into the dresser. Aiden moves quickly from the bed, clawing at my father’s shirt, trying to get him off of me.
"It's disrespect like that which made it easy for me to let Father Briar take charge of cleansing your sinful mind," He hisses, the thought of them agreeing on anything seeming absurd.
As my airways tighten, I'm thrown back to my childhood, recalling every time my father's drunken beatings went too far. His grip tightens slightly, and suddenly, I'm in my dorm room again, withEric'sdrunken eyes watching me as he–
Aiden kicks my dad square in the crotch from behind. He releases my throat, and I crumple to the floor, gasping for air. My mother’s cold hand touches my face, a broken look in her eyes as I look up at her, my vision blotchy. I hear my father’s footsteps move quickly to Aiden as he tries to get beyond his reach.
"Wait-"
"You'll make it worse," My mother whispers, her lips pressed to my ear, my neck throbbing with pain from my father's grip. She holds me still as I look over to see Aiden trembling, the kind of fear written across his face something I’m intimately familiar with.
He's been hurt like me.
By our own fucking father.
And my mother knows.
Grabbing Aiden's collar, he begins tugging him towards the door as my brother struggles to resist him. Nudging my mother off of me, I follow after them.
I don’t care if this is a dumb idea. I have to do something.
"I told Aiden to smoke the weed," I hiss, watching as my dad pauses his steps. "I told him to smoke the weed and dared Zack to take my car on a joy ride to scare Aiden while he was still high. None of it was his idea." My breaths are quickand shallow as my mind works to come up with a way out of this. Fuck the consequences.
"You believe in God's divine faith, as well as truth. Don’t punish Aiden for my sins," I beg.
He releases Aiden, a mixture of confusion and irritation written across his brow.
