Page 47 of Echoes of Us
His workspace was exactly what she'd expect - organized stacks of papers and books, a half-drunk coffee cup repurposed as a pencil holder, and a photo of him and his mother.Dale busied himself with an electric kettle tucked between stacks of physics journals.The soft domestic scene made her chest ache.
"So," he said, handing her a steaming mug."Want to talk about it?"
She curled her fingers around the warm ceramic, watching the steam rise in lazy spirals."He used to read me poems," she found herself saying."Beautiful ones, thoughtful and special.He'd leave them for me to find when I needed them most.He..."She swallowed hard."He took care of me.Noticed things no one else did."
Dale's expression softened."Breakups are hard.It's only natural to find yourself missing the person who used to be your point of balance."
Dale’s words and the quiet of his office wrapped around her like a blanket, broken only by the soft whirring of his computer and the distant hum of the building's ancient heating system.
There was something about his presence, about the safe space he created without trying, that made long-buried memories float to the surface.Maybe it was the late hour, the warmth of his sweater against her skin, or just the way he made silence feel like comfort.
"It's funny," she said softly, the words rising unbidden."The things you can see through a child's eyes."
Dale didn't speak, he just shifted slightly in his chair to show he was listening.
"Like...like how someone can smile while their eyes stay dead."She could remember it, see it."The way my mother's hands would shake when she poured coffee in the mornings.How she'd stare at Dad's empty chair like she was trying to wish him there."
She was surprised to feel tears sliding down her cheeks.When had she started crying?
"I was nine when I found out."The words caught.She took a sip of tea, trying to steady herself."My father...he was in love with someone else.She was Mom's closest friend and had been for years.They did everything together - dinner parties, family vacations.Her husband was Dad's golf partner."A bitter laugh escaped."The perfect couple.Until they weren't."
Dale slid the tissue box closer without comment.His silence felt like permission.
"He never knew I knew.Still doesn't.But I watched my mother fade like someone was slowly dimming her light.And the worst part?"Fresh tears spilled."She blamed herself.Like maybe she'd pushed them together, introducing them, creating all those memories."
She dabbed at her eyes."It ended eventually.Her friend moved to Chicago with her husband.No dramatic confrontation, no public scene.Just...distance.Empty chairs at dinner carefully worded Christmas cards.And my parents..."She swallowed hard."They stayed together.Built something different.But I'd learned by then.Learned to watch for the signs, to read between the lines.The way Mom's hand still shakes when her friend's name comes up in conversation.How she gets this look, this horribly forced brightness, whenever Dad mentions them.Twenty years of friendship just...erased.Like it never existed."
Dale made a soft sound of understanding, and somehow, that broke something loose in her chest.
"I promised myself I'd never be her," her voice cracked."Never be the woman who had to analyze every gesture, catalog every smile, wondering if..."She stopped, realizing she was describing exactly what she'd been doing with Cole all week.
Fresh tears spilled, catching her off guard.Dale wordlessly offered another tissue.
"Sorry," she whispered."I've never told anyone this.I don't even know why I'm telling you now."
Dale's response, when it came, was gentle."Sometimes the heaviest secrets are the ones we've carried alone the longest."
Ashley looked into his eyes and then at his soft, hopeful gaze that made her heart beat faster.
Oh God.
She was doing exactly what her father had done - playing with people's hearts, creating impossible situations.Here she was, seeking comfort from Dale while longing for Cole, letting one brother's kindness soothe the other's cruelty.The very thing she'd sworn she'd never do - make someone question if they were enough.
"I have to go," she whispered, standing so abruptly her tea sloshed.“Thank you so much.I think I needed that.”
“You don’t have to, stay-”
"I'm sorry, but I- I can't be here."Ashley left his office in a rush, her steps trying to erase the damage that she’d already done.She ran like her life depended on it.
She ran because she wasn't afraid of becoming her mother anymore.She was afraid she'd already become her father.
CHAPTER17
Sarah took one look at Ashley curled in her bed, still wearing Dale's sweater and sighed."Marie told me what happened at the party."
Ashley burrowed deeper under her covers.She'd spent the night alternating between crying and staring at the ceiling, trying to untangle the mess she'd made of everything.Tomorrow, Cole would graduate.Tomorrow, he'd stand with his family - with Dale - and she'd have to watch, knowing she'd managed to hurt them both.
"Cole was a wreck after you left," Sarah said quietly, perching on the edge of Ashley's bed."Ezra had to practically carry him home."
