Page 41 of Echoes of Us
"I have a class to go to," he said, gathering his papers.But he paused, looking at her with those kind gray eyes."Thank you, Ashley.For listening.For understanding.And..."He hesitated."Whatever's happening with you and Cole...just...be careful with him.He pretends nothing can hurt him, but..."
"But that's part of the pretense," she finished quietly.
Dale's smile was sad but genuine."Exactly."
She watched him leave, her coffee gone cold and her heart aching with the weight of everything she couldn't say.How could she tell him that in trying to save his life, she might be falling in love with his brother all over again?
That somehow, impossibly, she might be falling a little bit in love with him, too.
CHAPTER14
The library had emptied hours ago, leaving them alone in their third-floor study room.Outside, night pressed against leaded windows, turning them into black mirrors that reflected the warm glow of their desk lamp.Ashley shifted in her chair, tugging self-consciously at her skirt - the only clean thing left after a week of marathon study sessions.The fabric was shorter than she'd remembered, made worse by how it rode up every time she crossed her legs.
"Again."Cole's voice cut through her fatigue."The equation for quantum tunneling."
She recited it perfectly, the formula flowing from her lips like poetry after seven days of his relentless drilling.His eyebrows rose slightly - the closest thing to approval she'd seen all week.
"And its practical application?"
"The sun," she said, surprising herself with the certainty in her voice."Without quantum tunneling, nuclear fusion wouldn't be possible.The sun wouldn't shine."
Something shifted in his expression.He leaned back, abandoning his rigid posture for the first time in hours."Interesting choice of example."
"Why?"
"Most would pick something more obvious.Scanning tunneling microscopes.Flash memory in computers."His eyes held hers."But you went straight for the sun.The thing that makes life possible."
Heat crept up her neck."Maybe I like looking at the bigger picture."
"Do you?"He turned slightly toward her, his knee almost brushing hers under the table."Then tell me this - in a universe governed by uncertainty, where even particles can exist in multiple states simultaneously, how do we know anything for sure?"
The question hit closer to home than he could know.Ashley stared at her notes, seeing not equations but the tangled threads of past and future, of certainty and chaos."Maybe we don't.Maybe certainty is just...an illusion we create to feel safe."
"Safe," he repeated, testing the word."Is that what you want?To feel safe?"
She looked up and found him watching her with an intensity that made her breath catch."No," she whispered."I want to feel alive."
The air between them changed, charged with something more dangerous than physics.Cole's eyes dropped to where her skirt had ridden up, then snapped back to her face.His hands clenched on the table.
"What are you doing here, Ashley?"His voice was low, rough."Really doing here?"
"Studying physics," she said, but even she heard the lie in her voice.
"Bullshit."He moved so suddenly she gasped - one moment in his chair, the next standing over her, bracing his hands on her armrests."You don't need physics.You don't need a summer research position.So why are you really here?"
She should lie.Should make up something about academic curiosity or career advancement.Instead, she found herself reaching up, tracing the sharp line of his jaw with trembling fingers."Because I can't stay away from you."
He jerked back like she'd burned him, something like fear flashing across his face before anger replaced it."Don't."
"Don't what?"
"Don't look at me like that."He pushed away from her chair, running a hand through his hair."Like you see something worth saving."
His words vibrated through her.Ashley stood, her legs unsteady."Is that what you think this is?That I want to fix you?"
"Isn't it?"His laugh was sharp."The good girl with her psychology degree, trying to understand what makes the bad twin tick?Let me save you the trouble - I'm not a thesis project."
"No," she said quietly."You're not.You want to know what I see when I look at you, Cole?I see someone who's so afraid of failing to meet expectations that he'd rather burn everything down first.Someone who's brilliant but terrified of that brilliance because it ties him to a future he never chose."Her voice cracked."I see someone who pushes people away before they can leave him."
