Page 32 of Blue-Eyed Jacks
You didn’t.I shrugged.“Never used the oven.You might want to check for mice before you fire it up.”
“Mice?”
Something between a groan and a squeak escaped my throat.“That’s why everything stays in tins or sealed containers.Don’t leave anything out.”
Her hands went to her face and then she rubbed the tension from her jaw and moved farther back to linger on her nape.
“Let me.”I spun her until her back was to me, then worked the knots out of her shoulders.“I hope you realize I’m not rich.I can’t give you a mansion or much of anything at all.”
She stopped me by turning quickly and covering my mouth.“I don’t expect anything from you.You have been more than generous, and I don’t deserve it.”
It was my turn to cover her mouth and tell her she was absolutely wrong.“Wrong.What you didn’t deserve, you escaped two years ago.Now?IwishI could give you more.”
Kate lifted to her toes and pulled my face close to hers.“Thank you.”Then her lips hit mine, and I forgot we were arguing.The closest thing to it was the way our tongues tangled.She made a noise that hummed in my mouth.I turned us to the stairs that cut the building in half.But in order to get up them, I had to break the kiss.
It was almost too difficult to do.I wanted to keep kissing her forever.But we were already at the unbuttoning stage, and I’d be damned if I took her on that filthy old couch.When I squeezed her ass hard, she gasped.I took that moment to break contact with her mouth.“Upstairs.Watch your head.”
She didn’t have to worry about hitting her head as much as I did.The sloped ceiling angled sharply at the end of the staircase.Walk more than one step on the landing and it entered the danger zone for me.Or was that the antique bed with barely room for both of us on it?
Kate took her shirt off as I shucked my jeans and dug out a condom.The non-perishables in the car could wait; this couldn’t.I had a deadline to meet, or else I’d expose the connection here.Today, maybe tomorrow, I could indulge myself with her fair skin, the beauty of her sighs, and the soft way her smile filtered through her eyes after the pinnacle of ecstasy we somehow managed to reach together.
In that space, where breathing slowed and reality was an ambiguous thing, I found something I never had.It scared me.Thrilled me.Devastated me.This art we made was as fleeting as blowing on a dandelion puff.One minute whole, and in the next breath, a wish or a dream.And in its wake, the devastation of touching an intangible something that was flawless.
But I couldn’t stop picking up another one and whispering that desire into my heart.Holding my breath and letting the gust of passion flow in kisses and sweat.Puffing again and again, gripping the last dregs of that desperation until the seeds floated away.
I traced her skin.My soul ached to tell her how I felt.But my words would kill her.That, I vowed, would never happen.
“I’m going to do whatever it takes to keep you safe, Kate.”
Her eyes met mine.Hope lingered there.“Are you staying?”
No.“I can’t.Shock will notice.Right now, I’ve got an alibi.But I’m going to have to leave soon.And once I’m gone, I can’t come back.Ever.”I worried about her.“Are you going to be okay?”Without me.Will you recover from the loss?Or would I?
Her fingers tangled in my hair.And she stunned me.“Are you?”They tightened slightly to shake some sense into my foolishness.
Should I be honest?I’d been altered by her.The man I was a month ago, or two years ago, was not the same one I was in this bed.Going back to that life revolted me.
But it was the only way I could protect her, so I lied.“I’ll be just fine, babe.”
Chapter 10
July 23, 2008—Kate
Jackson’s fingers tightened on my hips.Not painfully, but hard enough that I felt the tremors he tried to hide.He’d stayed with me for three days.But this morning, the urgency in our love-making and the way his eyes scanned the horizon made me nervous.“Are you sure you’ll be okay?”
“I’ll be fine.”I was lying, but he needed to hear those falsehoods.I could be strong, so he’d be safe.I knew there was a huge possibility that Shock would find me despite Jackson’s plots.That didn’t scare me as much as what would happen to him if he didn’t leave.“You can go.I’m good.”He’d introduced me to Crystal, who lived a half mile down the road.And to the local sheriff who lived literally next door.In fact, John stood on his front steps, coffee in hand, watching the road.
Perhaps he picked up on Jackson’s nervousness, or perhaps he was just nosy that way.It was strange how much of a contrast this little island was from Pittsburgh.I’d lived my entire life in a city, never noticing how much people ignored your business.Until I needed help.Then that deliberate blindness became a nightmare.
Here?The connectivity was subtle.Like drinking coffee on your front steps.Or knowing everyone’s first and last names.Where they lived.Whetherthey were born in this county or were from “away”—as they put it.Few of the latter group remained during the winter.Only three hundred residents remained on this island once the icy storms rolled in.On the bigger island, a mere thousand braced nature’s worst.The bustle of the summer tourist season would vanish, and having people to count on like Crystal and John was necessary.The whole island was made up of brave, unselfish folks like that.
“If you have trouble with the generator or the—”
I cut Jackson off.“I’ll talk to John.Right John?”I raised my voice, so he’d hear.He smiled and raised a friendly hand to wave.Agreeing without knowing what he was agreeing to—but that didn’t matter with him.He’d do what was requested of him.It was comforting and scary at the same time.
Jackson kicked a ridge of gravel.“I can’t come back.”
“I know.”
