Page 73 of Knot Just Their Nanny
His eyes hold mine, and there’s a shimmer of what could be tears, but I know Ben; he’s not one to let them fall easily. He nods, takes a deep breath, and leans into my touch.
“You’re too good to me,” he murmurs.
“No, she was terrible to you. I’m going to show you again what love looks like, but I need you to let me, Ben. Don’t back away. I won’t hurt you, and I won’t hurt Mia, ever. This is real now, and reality can be scarier than any confrontation of feelings.”
“Thank you,” he murmurs, and there’s something like hope lighting up his face now. It’s beautiful, and it makes everything feel worth it.
“Let’s get some soup and some sleep,” I say after a beat.
“Sounds like a plan.”
We head into the kitchen, not touching but close. I’m still worried about the choice he’s going to make when my heat hits in a couple of days, but I’m not going to push him or even ask him again. He will do whatever he’s going to do, and I’ll be there for him regardless.
Chapter 40
Zara
The tomato and basil aroma fills the kitchen, soothing my jangled nerves. Ben is in the dining room, setting the table, and each clink of cutlery is a reminder that our little unit is functioning and that there’s normalcy in the chaos of our emotions.
Henry dishes up the soup, and Liam brings over the tray of bread and butter, which looks like slices of pure heaven.
“This is simple, but so fucking good,” I say with a smile at Henry, who beams.
“You ain’t seen nothing yet,” he says.
Smiling, we join Ben in the dining room and sit down to bowls of the steaming soup.
“So, how was work today?” I ask, forcing casualness into my tone. It’s important to keep things light, to not let the weight of what’s looming dampen every interaction.
Liam chuckles softly. “Same old, same old. Though Gareth managed to spill coffee on his pants and spent half the day looking like he’d had an accident.”
I giggle at the image. “Poor bloke. Could he not have used the hand dryer in the loo?”
“Paper towels, so he was shit out of luck,” Ben says, trying to sound casual, but I can see the tension in his eyes.
We find comfort in the domestic simplicity of sharing a meal. As we eat, a peaceful silence envelops us. It’s not awkward or strained, but rather a moment of stillness before the impending storm, which we all know is my heat. I can already feel the hot soup flushing my skin as my pre-heat simmers under the surface.
Henry leans back, watching me with a keen yet gentle gaze. “Are you feeling alright?” he inquires, his voice laced with concern but not pushing too hard. He seems to have mastered the skill of knowing just how far to prod without it being too much.
I nod. “Yeah, just a little warm is all. Now that I’m not distracted, it’s hitting me again.”
Liam reaches across the table and hands me a glass of water. “Here, this might help cool you down a bit.”
I take a few sips, grateful for the cold liquid soothing my throat. The truth is, the heat is like an itch I can’t scratch yet, an anticipatory buzz under my skin that’s powerful and exhilarating.
We finish our meal with light banter, but I can tell the alphas are glancing at each other when they think I’m not looking. They’re worried about how things will go when my heat arrives in full force. But for now, they’re doing their best to keep things normal.
After dinner is cleared away and the dishwasher hums in the background, we hover awkwardly.
“I guess, I’ll head up. Mia will be waking soon,” I murmur.
Ben nods, looking like he wants to say something but can’t quite find the words. “I’ll come with you, give her a cuddle before she goes back down.”
“Okay,” I murmur, having hoped I could make a great escape from the strain I can feel building as my scent gets more potent around these alphas.
We make our way upstairs, the creak of each step punctuating the silence that has settled between us. As we enter Mia’s nursery, the soft glow of the nightlight casts dancing shadows across the room. Mia stirs in her crib, her little fists clenched as if she’s dreaming about gripping something tightly.
I pick her up gently, cradling her in my arms as she nuzzles into my chest, still half-asleep. Ben stands next to me, his hand lightly touching Mia’s back, his expression softening with every tiny sigh she makes.
