Page 41 of Wicked Lies Grow Wildflowers
My screen lights up and I rush to check it, heart pounding from my thoughts of Xander.
Xander: The prettiest wildflower I’ve ever seen. I’ll be over in 20.
Excited to thank him in person for the sweet gesture, I freshen up and change out of my work clothes into my usual home attire of cute but comfy loungewear, slipping into an extrasaucy matching bra and panty set while I’m at it—not that it will stay on long.
Sitting on the couch staring at the ceiling, I wiggle my feet back and forth, wishing time would speed up another ten minutes. I start to doze off, and the knock at the door startles me, the sensation that I’m falling through space, like when you jolt out of a dreamless sleep, catapulting me up. I take a few seconds to catch my bearings before yelling over to the door, “Just a sec!”
I beam at Xander when the door opens and roll onto my tippy toes to kiss him before pulling him inside by his jacket. He leans down for another kiss, andGod, he smells like his aftershave. My senses are overridden with the intense desire to bottle that smell and drink it in. I don’t let him separate from our kiss, our lips locking and tongues tasting as we stand in front of the door, my hands still clutching his jacket. He holds my neck tenderly but with an air of possession as we delve into each other. Knowing that he has such a strong hold on such a delicate part of my body drives me crazy, sending shockwaves down to my toes. Eventually, though, I have to come up for air and take a half step away from him, breathing heavily, my body on fire. The things this man does to me without even trying, he’s like a walking aphrodisiac.
Xander’s gaze is heated, all of his intentions crystal clear as he stares at me. Rolling my bottom lip between my teeth I remember the flowers. “I fully intend on continuing this in just a minute, but I wanted to say thanks for the flowers you dropped off while I was at work. It was very sweet of you.”
The look he flashes me is one of pure confusion, “What flowers?”
I scoff at that, “Uh, the one’s sitting on the kitchen table? The ones that were in the selfie I sent?” My tone comes off a bitannoyed because I’m not in the mood to play games unless they can be played in the bedroom.
“Maeren, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I didn’t send you any flowers.”
“Xander, come on, that's not funny.” I start to get a little worried and a little wounded.
“Maeren, I’m serious, I didn’t drop off any flowers or have someone do it for me. I literally don’t know what you’re talking about,” his tone is soft and confused, but his body is stiff.
I stand there, mind reeling for a minute as I try to figure out what the actualfuckis going on right now. I try to calm myself, not wanting to cry prematurely over a silly little misunderstanding, I just feel sostupidright now.
“Oh, okay. I just thought they were from you because of all the other ones I’ve gotten and all of the notes,” I pause and take a breath, unable to meet his eyes. “I shouldn’t have assumed, that was dumb of me. I shouldn’t automatically think that because you’ve done it before you’d always do it. Maybe they were just delivered to the wrong apartment,” I swallow, hoping my voice didn’t waver too much. My face feels hot and I can feel sweat from the heat of my embarrassment dripping down my back.
“What other flowers? What notes?!” He’s starting to make me nervous, his words laced with more than just concern now, maybe a bit of anger?
“I’ve been getting flowers and notes from you for the last two months? Are you kidding me Xander? They started showing up right after we met. I meanright after. About every week or so I’d find a flower or a note at my door, or on my car?” My words trail off, filled with confusion and accusation. I can hear Leanne’s cruel voice telling me that I’m making things up.
Xander looks pale now and his next words come out eerily level, “I didn’t once leave you flowers like that, or any fucking notes.” His arms are crossed as he stares at me.
“Come on,” I run both hands over my temples, “the act is up. You don’t need to pretend. I know you were following me long before we were anything at all. That’s why you went throughmefor that house when you could have gone through any other realtor in the agency. Or fuck the entire city. But you choseme. And when we crossed paths at the White Rabbit for the second time. I went back hoping you’d be there and find me again. And you did the same, didn’t you? You wanted to see me.” I point a finger at Xander’s chest, my mind whirling. It has to be him,right?It’s the only thing that makes any sense, because if it’s not him then who the hell is it? I don’t even want to entertain the thought of someone I don’t know stalking me for months. I ignore the nausea brewing in my stomach and continue on.
“And then immediately after we met for the second time the flowers and notes started coming, and there were several times when I was running and I felt like someone was watching. That wasyou, wasn’t it? So you can drop the act and just own up to it all, Xander. I’m not mad, or freaked out, not now. It was a little intense in the beginning, I admit, but I know I’m safe with you.” I get it all out and glance up at Xander, noticing his now ashen face, worried eyes, slack jaw.Oh God. Why is he looking at me like that?
“Maeren,no. None of that was me. You have to believe me I don’t know who the fuck did all of that but itwasn’t me.” Raking a hand through his hair he heaves out a breath that feels heavier than lead.
No. No ithasto be him. Nothing else makes any sense. It’s him, it has to be. But why won’t he just admit it. Tears sting my eyes now as my frustration peaks, emotion coating my next words. “Why are you lying to me? I accept you. All of you. Even these weird obsessive parts of you. I know it’s just because you care and I’m not afraid of it.”
Xander shakes his head back and forth, a look of betrayal in his eyes, a look of soul deep fucking hurt. “I’ll say this one more time.It. Wasn’t. Me.”
“But you call meWildflowerfor fucks sake! Wildflower,leaving flowers. It just fucking makes sense! I don’t see anyone else. I don’t talk to anyone else. It’syou!”
Xander reaches out and grabs me by my shoulders, firmly holding me in place, leveling me with one hard look.“It. Wasn’t. Me.”
My tears are falling fast now as I heave in shaky gasps of air, feeling confused, hurt, and lied to. But what if he’s not lying at all?
Xander reaches out to cup my jaw and I scramble back from him. “Don’t fucking touch me!” I yell. Shock fills every vein as I realize I’ve never yelled at him before. We’ve never fought, and yet this feels like the worst possible fight we could’ve led with.
“Maeren—please. It’s just a misunderstanding, let’s just work through it,” his voice breaks.
“Get out! Just get the fuck out! Get out get out get out!” I’m screaming now, borderline hysterical as I shove my hands at his chest. Xander looks absolutely gutted as he rakes his hands through his hair before sliding a palm down his face. He spares me one last glance as I fall apart and spins around, leaving because I pushed him away. The sound of the door closing is the last thread to be snapped and I lose it.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
XANDER
A tight feelinginvades my chest as I leave Maeren’s apartment. What the fuck just happened? She doesn’t believe me, she thinks I’m the one that left the notes and flowers but it wasn’t fucking me. I can see how she thought that, especially with me giving her the pet name Wildflower. It fits, it fucking fits, and paints me to be a liar.
