Page 97 of A Certain Step
Short and simple, maybe he could post that. No, it needed to be perfect. It needed to be poetic. It needed to reflect every ounce of his heart because Willa was everything to him. His love for her had to be palpable. It’s what she deserved.
He finished making his bed and met them in the kitchen, finding Willa sitting on the floor with Tulip.
“Do you ever wonder how much simpler life would be if you were a cat? If you’re lucky enough to find a good home, you’re entirely oblivious to how gross the world can be, and you just get a bunch of people who love you even when all you do is sleep ninety percent of the day.”
He chuckled, sliding down to sit beside her.
Willa curled her arm into his elbow and burrowed her head into his shoulder. He placed his other hand on her fingers, gently grazing his thumb along her skin.
“Yeah, but I think I’d want to be some sort of a sea creature in another life. Be able to breathe underwater,” Ethan replied.
“I’d say I want to be a crow so I could fly, but hey, they’re just as hated as I am right now.” She looked up at him, smiling. “Too soon?”
“A bit.”
A sad, strange little laugh left her lips. “I think that’s why it hurts so much,” she said, eyes fixed onthe island in front of them.
“It’s bringing up all the bad memories from when I was bullied as a kid. I know I told you parts of it, but I wasn’t a cute kid. People were vicious. They called me all sorts of names. It wasn’t until I started taking dance classes that I found a place to fit in. I was really shy and quiet—I couldn’t defend myself. They didn’t bother getting to know me. They just mocked. And I know kids are cruel; most grow out of that, but this feels so similar. It took years of therapy to work through my self-doubts and fears of inadequacy. I know better than to let it get to me, but it stings.”
He tilted his head and placed a kiss on her temple. “I’d bully all those kids right back, and then I’d only hang out with you.”
“I bet you were adorable when you were little,” she replied.
He laughed. “Not many people have glasses kinks. I’ve been four eyes since I was in elementary school.”
“Sucks to be them because they’re wrong.”
Tulip walked by them, sweeping against their sprawled feet before leaving them alone in the kitchen. “How do you feel about me saying something?” Ethan asked.
She sighed heavily. He hated bringing it back up since she was doing fine for a split second.
“I trust you. If you feel it’s right, it’s your call to make,” she answered.
“But what would you be comfortable with? What doyouwant me to do?”
“I want to hide, except that’s not an option.”
Moving his arm and facing her fully, Ethan rested his hand against the lines on her face. He looked at her for a beat—his best girl, his best friend, the absolute, unmistakable love of his life. “I can’t promise this is the last time something will hurt you. But I can promise that whatever comes our way, I’m going to be right here to take it on with you. Your happiness is always going to be my number one priority.”
Willa burst into tears. “You’ve broken a dam in me. I can’t keep crying like this,” she sniffled.
He brought his lips to her face this time, wiping the tears away with kisses in their place. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Please don’t cry.”
She bobbed her head from side to side. “These aren’t sad tears. These are ‘I’mgrateful for you’tears.”
Ethan kissed her with everything in him, pleasantly surprised when she reciprocated by climbing on top of him with her legs, hugging him close.
“Would you be mad if I went home today?” she asked.
Ethan shook his head. “Of course not. Why would I be mad?”
“I don’t know. I just need to process it all. Sit with my emotions for a bit.”
“Promise me that you’re okay,” he started to say.
She drew both her hands to either side of his face. “I will be. I didn’t want this to get in the way of us. And I’m not going to let it. But I don’t want to feel small, and right now, I feel small. I need to be the one to pick myself up if that makes sense.”
He tipped his face sideways to kiss her palm.
