Page 65 of A Certain Step
He shook his head. “No, I just assumed since you usually have the soap in your bathroom and the candles burning when I’m over.”
Huh.Christ, he had been observant, and it sent a prickle of elation down her spine.
“Your assumption is correct. You can thank Beatrix Davidian for that—we have lilac trees in our backyard, and she stops to smell them every time we pass one. She also keeps candles around for when they aren’t in bloom.”
His lips curved into a sweet, satisfied smile. “I’ll jot that down for when I eventually meet her.” He rose from her seat, and she swapped with him, turning to pet Tulip as he left to shower.
She browsed through the comments Sahar had curated, then finally braced herself to open social media and focusonlyon the messages and tags from people she knew and followed.
Clicking through their stories one by one, she saw that all their cast members had shared the photograph Sahar had posted on her feed. She sent each of them a small reply and commented underneath theactual photo with, “I love you to the bloody moon, you bewitching creature.” She refreshed the app, noticing Ethan’s icon (an unfairlyhotpromotional still of him as Darcy) pop up with a new story.
He had also shared Sahar’s post ten minutes ago while she’d been in the shower.Proud and grateful to share the stage with an absolute powerhouse of a performer and my best friend.She turned to Tulip, who was now on her back, paws in mid-air, belly up. “He’s something, isn’t he, girl? How do I not fall madly in love with a man like that?” she added, rubbing the spot underneath Tulip’s chin.
She replied to Ethan’s story with a sobbing emoji and a purple heart, set her phone down, and released a purposeful exhale. Right now, isolated and alone in his bedroom, everything felt right. She could stay like this, in the shadows where the outside world had no say in their relationship. But aggravating thoughts tried to crash through her barricaded happiness anyway.
People are nice right now but just wait. The horrible comments are out there. Sahar is shielding you from them. You don’t deserve to be up on that stage. You haven’t earned it. You don’t deserve Ethan’s love. You’re a nobody; he’s one of Broadway’s biggest stars. He’ll get tired of you—your face, your body, your personality. Whatever opportunity you get after this show, it’ll be because of Ethan, not you.
Willa shut her eyes, taking in another deep inhale and releasing a forceful exhale. Inhale, exhale, repeat. None of that tonight—please.The noises inside her head were too loud, too demanding. Ethan’s neighborhood was quieter, but there should’ve been some noise still. Where was a fire engine or loud group chattering when you needed them most?
She willed herself to focus on what she could control—the present, the truth behind Ethan’s eyes, his kindness,his friendshipabove all things. How he cared for her. His innate goodness. Then she unlocked her phone and put The National on shuffle. The first few notes of “You Were a Kindness” bustled through the speakers. Appropriate and perfectly on cue, universe.
Who helped regulate an emotional downward spiral better than the Sad Dads? No one.
She looked around his room from the spot she sat in, taking note of how organized he was. His house was always neat, but this was her first time seeing the inside of his bedroom. The dark green walls were a pleasant touch, and most of his mahogany furniture had a homey feel. He had more things in his living room than in the bedroom, but a scenic painting of Italy hung above his bed.
Ethan ambled back in just as the song ended and switched to “Light Years.” He wore his glasses again, stimulating a somersault in her chest and a massive grin over which she had zero control. At least she didn’t have to hide it now.
He arched an eyebrow. “What?”
“Did I ever tell you I have a thing for men in glasses?”
The most enchanting chuckle escaped his throat, a wildly picturesque smile on full display. “What else do you have a thing for?”
She rose from the footboard bench. “Forearms.”
He took in her words, eyes darting up and down her frame. “You already told me that one. What else?”
She smiled. “That’s all you’re getting now.”
“I’ll take it. Which side of the bed do you want?”
“Whichever one you don’t usually sleep on?”
“The right.”
“Works for me. If murderers come in, they’re taking you first.”
He laughed, drawing the covers and handing her a new pillowcase that’d been sitting atop them.
“Are you a blanket hog?” he asked.
“Not that I know of. Do you snore?”
He shook his head. “I’ve never been told I do, so I’m going to say no.”
“We’ll see,” she drew her shoulders inward a bit, “I…I, uh, might kick you.”
His eyes widened adorably. “Aha, ladies and gentlemen, we’ve uncovered a flaw. And you were worried about Tulip causing problems.”
