Page 97 of Nodus Tollens
“What if Kate walks in?” She mumbled into my neck.
“Doubtful.” I closed my eyes, squeezing her tighter as if she might disappear. “But if she does, it won’t be that big of a deal.”
“Oh yeah?” She lifted herself from the crook of my neck, causing my eyes to open. “And what if James stumbles in behind her?” Her brown brow lifted and I’m immediately hit with rage. The thought of someone else seeing her like this, all flushed and naked, made me murderous.
No fucking way.
Removing my arm from around her waist, I released her.
“Jesus, Blue. Now you have me wanting to murder my goddamn teammate.” I grumbled and watched as she fumbled off the bed and started dressing.
“Why?” Her laughter brightened my sudden bitter mood and jealousy until all I could focus on was the sheer beauty of the girl beside me. “It was just a hypothetical question, Hayes. No one has seen or will ever see me naked beside you.” She bounced around on her feet, yanking her leggings up, but my eyes were drawn to her chest.
Fuck.
I wanted to lick her all over again.
Once she was finished getting dressed, I reached for her arm and yanked her onto the bed. A giggle-yelp escaped from her mouth, but I quickly covered it with a searing kiss. I found myself ravishing her mouth in earnest. With her on top of me, grinding those little hips as I swallowed her tongue. We kissed until were out of breath and sated. Once we pulled apart, she rested her forehead against mine.
“Thank you for this.” She breathed into me. “Thank you for being you.”
There was much more meaning behind those words than one would think. It wasn’t just about me. It was about my acceptance, my love, and my promise. It was recognition that one day all this would come to an end. That, even though our days were numbered, our moments weren’t. I’d make it my goal, my goddamn mission on earth, to make this girl happy during whatever time we had left. That’s why I held her tighter. Placed another kiss against her sweet mouth because I knew this wasn’t forever, and although my heart felt like breaking every time I thought about it, she pieced me back together with her undying love.
The greatest treasure of all.
22
HAYES
Ever since that day in Blue’s dorm, I’ve had vivid dreams almost nightly. Mostly ones that involved my mouth and her naked body, but last night was different. Something had changed. It wasn’t like any other dream I’ve had. Instead, it looked more like a happily ever after to a story that would never get one.
It was of a future that I longed for. A beautiful home on acreage, ranch style, with towering cedar trees surrounding it and a small lake in the backyard. I could clearly remember walking around the home in awe, searching each room, when I came across a white door. There was nothing special about it, but the sound coming from beyond it intrigued me. I then opened the door slowly, and what greeted me almost knocked me on my ass.
Blue.
My beautiful Blue, dressed in a white sundress, cradling a baby in her arms. God, she looked fucking ethereal, like an angel with her golden hair hanging over her shoulders as a bright smile peered down at the child in her arms.
“Daddy!” A voice shouted, and I felt a small force hit me just below my waist and wrap around me. I could remember the wild tempo of my heart as I noticed a blonde little boy holding onto my leg and staring up at me.
I couldn’t speak.
I couldn’t think.
My watering eyes never wavered from the dimpled-cheeked boy who grinned at me like I was his whole world. A mixture of my green eyes and Blue’s cute little freckled nose, this had to be our son. That’s when I heard her voice. My Blue. My girl.
“Baby, you’re home.” She cooed softly in a voice that was permanently seared into my heart.
The next thing I knew, I had soft lips pressing against my cheek and a hand caressing my arm.
“I missed you.” She whispered as I took her in beside me. She was still the same beautiful girl I fell in love with, but small, aging lines were etched across her forehead, and I couldn’t help but get choked up.
God, she was still so beautiful.
But this wasn’t real.
Despite how fucking bad I wanted to believe in this dream, it was never going to be a reality for me. A long life with Blue, raising babies with Blue, making Blue my wife, none of it was true. I woke up with tears. I woke up wanting to punch holes in my bedroom wall and throw every stupid, meaningless thing in my life away. I even begged on my knees.
Don’t take her.
