Page 103 of Nodus Tollens
Because I’m almost positive he’s referring to me…
“Because it doesn’t. I’m over her, over this fucking conversation, so can we please talk about something else?” He growled in a tone that almost frightened me. It sent a chill down my spine, but it didn’t stop the spasm that went through my chest.
“Alright, calm down. We’ll talk about something else.” Hayes peered through the mirror to catch my reaction, and in his stare, I read worry. The silent question of if I was okay, and with a slight tilt of my mouth, I reassured him that I was fine.
“Your bruise is healing like shit.” Mal teased but still kept his serious tone while he said it.
Poor Hayes had a purple and blue blotch across his nose and cheek after the fight he got into at his game. I told him how stupid it was for him to let his emotions take over and how he didn’t need to worry about me so much, all while I had covered his face in small kisses.
“Does my bruise look bad, Blue?” Hayes questioned.
Smiling, I shook my head.
“No, it looks fine.”
He then lifted his sunglasses and winked at me.
“See. Blue says it looks fine. That’s all that matters.”
A scoff had fallen from Mal.
“You’re right. The guy who’s been in more fights and has had more bruises on his face to last a lifetime has no clue what he’s talking about…please.”
God, Mal was grumpy.
“Jesus, Mal.” Hayes chuckled. “Relax.”
“Oh, you mean like you did when you brutalized Davids’ face with your fist during the game?”
Sighing, I closed my journal and prepared for an argument to break out. Clearly, that’s what Mal wanted, right?
“I didn’t brutalize his face. The fucker had it coming when he kept body-checking me into the glass.”
Hayes burst into a fit of laughter.
“What about the thousand other times you’ve been hit? You finally just had to let all your anger out on that one night your girl wasn’t there to cheer you on?”
Oh shit.
My stomach dropped.
“Don’t bring Blue into this.” Hayes snarled. “Don’t act like it’s a goddamn sin for me to get into a fight when you’ve been throwing yourself into situations like that almost every game we’ve played together.”
“That’s because it isn’t you! You don’t fight. You don’t fucking lose control like that.” Mal snapped. “And I throw myself into those fights because it’s all I know. It’s all I’m good for, and it saves your ass from being on the receiving end of the punch. But I can’t fucking do that if you’re gonna be throwing punches, too!”
“You honestly think that’s all you’re good for?”
“Well, what the hell else am I good for if it’s not fighting?”
Hayes went silent. Not the kind where he didn’t know how to respond or what to say. It was more like he couldn’t believe Mal had even asked that. Like it physically pained him to hear those words. Though all I ever saw from Mal was a crestfallen, despondent person, Hayes saw him differently. He had to if they were best friends.
“You’re a born protector, Mal. You care even when you say you don’t, and you have the biggest heart, even if you try to deny it. Inside there.” Hayes pointed to Mal’s chest. “Is a man worthy of way more than he thinks, and one day, you’ll see it. One day, you’ll realize that I was right, and I can’t wait for you to admit it.”
If Hayes wasn’t preoccupied with driving, I’d climb over the center console and kiss the hell out of him. I’d give him the longest, tightest hug and never let him go. That’s how much I loved this man. Even when he was in an argument, even if he was being yelled at, he still found a way to spread kind words. Hayes manifested goodness, unlike anyone I’d ever known. A purity and selflessness that made my love for him only grow.
“You’ll be waiting a long fucking time.”
“Nah, I’d say in around five years. Or at least until you meet someone.”
