Page 33 of Losing Sleep
Grey jumped off the rock into the rapids with a yell, the current sucking him down into the river and away from us. He rode the water, dodging rocks, laughing and hollering until he was out of sight. Grey survived, and he even made it look fun.
I gave myself two deep breaths, just enough to calm my nerves but not enough to back out, before I jumped, praying I wouldn’t regret this.
Chapter Sixteen
The cold water greetedme, stealing my breath for a moment as the current transported me downstream. I allowed my lifejacket to pull me to the surface and sucked in a giant gulp of air once my head broke through the water. Adrenaline coursed through my veins, my heart pounding as the river pulled me away from the rock where I jumped.
“You did it!” Tory yelled, cheering behind me. Her voice rang with excitement.
I focused on the sharp rocks around me and the pull of the river. I kicked my feet, testing my control. The current was strong, but not impossible to navigate. I did my best to tuck my legs in, seeing the rocky edges beneath the water’s surface. I allowed the current to pull me past people cooling off in the river and around a bend until I came out in an open area where Grey stood waist-deep in the water, grinning.
“How was it?” he asked, extending a hand.
I grabbed it, allowing him to help me to my feet. I misjudged the strength of his grip, stumbling into him as I worked to find my balance on the rocks of the riverbed. My hand came to rest on his chest, his arms wrapping around my waist to steady me. His enveloping warmth contrasted with the chill of the breeze on my wet skin, and I found myself wanting to lean into him more and accept more of his help than was strictly necessary.
Startled at my thoughts, I took a step back, breaking his hold and instantly regretting the lost contact. I wasn’t sure what to do with the emotions and desires filling me.
“I survived.” I tried to hide my enjoyment, wanting to tease him and maybe even pull out his laugh, a sound I found myself craving in this moment.
Grey saw through my efforts, his grin stretching even farther. Water clung to his beard and hair, his eyes sparking with excitement.
“You loved it, didn’t you? Better than root beer milk, right?” He nudged me with his elbow, nearly throwing off my balance with his enthusiasm.
I couldn’t contain my smile anymore, a giant grin filling my face as I shook my head, water droplets scattering from my hair. “It was amazing!”
And the thing that made it even more amazing was the man standing next to me, cheering me on for my bravery. Bravery that, if I was being honest, had been minimal. Yet, Grey had a special ability to make me feel seen. Like he recognized just how difficult each step outside my comfort zone was and wanted to celebrate every single one with me.
A girl could get addicted to the energy and magnetism that was Grey.
“Makes you wonder what else you’ve been missing out on, doesn’t it?” Grey’s quiet comment, so similar to my ownthoughts, gave me pause as, together, we stood on the banks of the river watching for Trent and Tory.
“Maybe.” I conceded. Anxiety still curled in my belly, but there was also a fire there. Like something had awakened, and I wasn’t sure I wanted it to go back to sleep.
Tory appeared around the bend, followed shortly by Trent. She fairly glowed with happiness, in her element as she finished her float and stood from the river. Trent was stoic as ever, his face giving nothing away about his experience.
“Want to go again?” Grey asked, once our group reunited, Trent and Tory rounding out our circle.
I looked at the others for a moment, gauging their reactions. They looked at me, checking to make sure I was okay. I nodded, surprised at the excitement I felt at the prospect of jumping again. “Let’s do it!”
The four of us climbed out of the water and made the trek back to the other section of the river near where we jumped. A few more people had joined in the fun and were riding the rapids. We climbed in, and I dove to the rock shelf, making my way to the rapids, leading our group. The rush I felt silenced the what-ifs in my head, and I let myself enjoy my new adventure.
More and more, I was starting to think wandering off the expected path could be fun.
Chapter Seventeen
I didn’t say muchas we drove back to the cabin, mountains and trees passing outside my window. Instead, I reveled in the memory, still amazed at myself for jumping into the river. The towel underneath me was wet, likely soaking into the car seat. I’d kicked off my water shoes, allowing my toes the freedom they’d been craving all day. My hair was a disaster. A few tangled strands had escaped from my bun, and I could guarantee I had mascara smudges giving me raccoon eyes. Yet, I felt happy—content, even. I had jumped, despite fear and anxiety and self-doubt. Not just that, I’d jumped multiple times, experiencing a level of fun and enjoyment I hadn’t anticipated. Maybe there was something to be said for losing control every once in a while.
“They made it.” Tory exclaimed, pulling me from my thoughts.
A silver car was parked in the clearing next to Grey’s SUV. Tory parked on the other side of the silver car, and I quicklyslipped my water shoes back on, following the others out of the car.
The cabin door opened, and a group of three familiar faces trekked out onto the porch, waving. The twin blond-haired guys in their late twenties were staples at almost all of Tory’s social functions. While I knew there had to be other indicators, the only way I knew how to tell them apart was that Alex wore glasses and Brad didn’t. A few steps behind them was Kylie, one of Tory’s roommates. Her thick, auburn hair bounced in the wind, and her excitement was nearly tangible, coming off her in waves. She looked picture-perfect, with flawless makeup and hair, and I instantly felt self-conscious. I tightened my grip on the towel around my waist as I took in Kylie’s appearance and remembered my own wet, makeup-smudged state.
I hung back, following behind everyone as Tory dashed up the porch steps to hug her friends.
“How was the drive?” She slung an arm around each of the twins, leaving wet marks on their shirts as she hugged them simultaneously. They laughed, slipping from her grip with pretend dismay. Tory then turned to Kylie, who held up a hand with a laugh to stop her approach.
“I’ll wait on the hug until you’re dry”—she waved vaguely at Tory while taking a step back—“but it’s so good to see you.”
