Page 2 of Losing Sleep
Tears stung my eyes as I tried to push down my emotions. No matter how many times I told myself I was better off without either Lyle or Emily in my life, a part of me still missed how mylife used to be. I missed the security that came from knowing someone, even a self-obsessed guy like Lyle, loved and chose me above everyone and everything else. It was a level of security my life seemed destined to lack.
Sure, my mom loved me, but she never chose me first. She was always chasing something: the next adventure, the next get-rich-quick scheme. Then finally, when she’d opened her life and heart to dating again, she’d chosen Dave. While the two were perfect for each other, it had left me aching and questioning how I fit into the life they’d built together. Left me questioning where I belonged.
Chloe gave me a squeeze, bringing me back to the present. She jumped to her feet with an energy similar to the cartoon characters on her pajama shorts. “If ever there was an ice-cream-for-breakfast situation, this is it.”
I laughed and shook my head. “I’m about to spend five hours in the car with one of Tory’s friends whom I barely know. I’m going to need a lot more than ice cream to get me through.”
“Pepsi and ice cream for breakfast, then,” Mallory said, following me out of the room. “You can make a float.”
While sugar and caffeine would help, I had a sinking feeling the challenges of my day were just beginning.
Later, after both Chloe and Mallory had left for the day, a knock sounded on the front door. Ruby sprang from the faded plaid couch and rushed over to greet our new guest. I followed her, glancing through the peephole and taking in the tall guy with a well-trimmed beard, dark hair, and a large grin.
When Tory had first invited me on this trip, I’d tried every excuse I could think of, including undependable transportation, as a reason to stay home. Growing up, vacations had hardlybeen relaxing, thanks to my mom and her tendency to forget things like booking hotel rooms ahead of time and making sure we had enough money for food on the road. As an adult, my vacations had been sparse, mainly consisting of trips to visit my mom, stepdad, and half-sisters. The few trips I had gone on with friends had included Emily, something I actively chose to ignore.
Tory, who had known me since college, saw straight through my tricks. She insisted I needed to come on the trip to celebrate her birthday and distract me from thinking about Lyle and Emily’s wedding. Her solution to my car concerns currently stood outside my door, an hour late.
Maybe I should have opted to drive my own car, Jovi, instead. Named after Bon Jovi because my car was “Livin’ on a Prayer,” at least it would have left on time and wouldn’t have involved spending hours in the car with a stranger. And if Jovi broke down on the side of the road somewhere, I’d have an excuse to stay home instead of navigating a weekend of awkward social interactions, celebrating Tory’s birthday with her boyfriend, Trent, and all of her friends.
I opened the door and forced a smile as I took in my ride’s forest-green t-shirt, the outline of a mountain and the words “Not all who wander are lost” emblazoned across the chest.
“Hi, I’m Audrey. You must be Greyson.” I hoped my voice sounded welcoming instead of pinched and stilted from nerves.
“Everyone calls me Grey. Sorry I’m late.” He offered me his hand, and I took it hesitantly, his calluses rough against my palm as I gave it a quick shake.
“Nice to officially meet you. Hope you’re ready for the drive to Island Park.” I kept my tone bright, pausing in hopes he’d explain why he was late. Instead, he just grinned.
“Did you know Island Park has the longest main street in the world?” He spouted the trivia with clear enthusiasm, as if that explained his tardiness.
“I did. They have a sign.” I waved him inside the apartment, trying not to stress about the change in plans and how it would have been nice to have a warning that Grey would be late. Since waking up far too early this morning, I’d had ample time to think through our travel plans and build my own mental timeline. Grey had destroyed it before even arriving on my doorstep, and it left me feeling twitchy as I fought back flashbacks from my childhood and the countless times Mom had changed plans without telling me.
Relax. You have plenty of time to get to the cabin to celebrate Tory’s actual birthday tonight.
While the trip would last about a week, today was Tory’s birthday. She’d started the drive early this morning, determined to spend as much time as possible at the cabin with her boyfriend, Trent. I was driving up today with Grey instead of waiting to go up with the rest of the group tomorrow because I wanted to be with Tory on her birthday. Or at least, that was the official answer. Unofficially, Tory had decided I shouldn’t be home today because it was Lyle and Emily’s wedding day.
As I stepped back to let Grey in, I didn’t move quickly enough to block the doorway. Seeing her opportunity, Ruby bolted, making a beeline for the open door and freedom. Before I could react, Grey dropped to his knees on the laminate, arms extended.
“Hello, sweetheart! Aren’t you a pretty girl?” Grey gushed, offering his hand for Ruby to sniff.
Distracted from her escape attempt, Ruby took one whiff of the newcomer and immediately rolled over for a belly rub.
Grey gave her a few scratches before picking Ruby up and following me inside. Once I’d closed the door, Grey set Ruby down, and she trotted over to her food bowl as if nothing had happened.
“You ready to go? We don’t want to be too late getting to the cabin,” Grey said, checking the time on his phone. “Driving in the woods at night gets creepy fast.”
I scowled, annoyed that his comment made it sound like our delay wasmyfault. “I’ve been ready for the last hour.”
“Perfect. Let’s go. Do you need help with your bags?” Grey turned towards the door, pausing at the duffle, yoga mat, and backpack I had stacked in the entry.
“I’ve got it,” I said, waving him towards the door.
I gave Ruby one last pat, my fingers sinking into her fur for just a moment as I let her warmth comfort me before taking a deep breath and straightening. I could do this.
“Be good for Chloe and Mallory,” I called to Ruby as I grabbed my stuff and followed Grey out the door.
A knot of panic tightened in my stomach with each step I took. This was a bad idea. I just knew it.
Chapter Two
