Page 54 of Chasing Forever
Does it count as a date?
My mom just left.
The three dots pop up. Disappear. Pop up again.
I’ll come to you.
And thre’s my proof.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Brooks
I’m on the front porch with a beer and Mack at my side when Lottie pulls down my drive. She parks and climbs out, Mack climbing to his feet and bolting right over to her. He takes off as though she belongs to him. Hell, we both do.
She’s wearing jeans and a Plain Daisy Ranch sweatshirt, her hair thrown into a messy bun and not a stitch of makeup on.
Lottie’s beautiful, and seeing her so effortless only makes me desperate for more. She lightens something heavy inside me.
“Hi, Mack.” She crouches and, as always, nuzzles her head into Mack’s neck, her hands petting him all over. “Sorry about your mean visitor today.” Mack eats up the attention, happy to take whatever she’ll give.
“Leave Mommy alone,” I say. The joke tastes sour in my mouth and is my way to deflect. No one understands my family more than Lottie.
She shakes her head and walks up to the porch, sitting next to me and eyeing my beer. “You have one for me too?”
I pull one out from my side, twist off the cap, and hand it to her. She takes a sip and sits just like me with her legs spread, forearms on her knees, a beer bottle dangling from her fingertips.
“How bad was it?” she asks.
“I kicked her out.”
She blows out a breath. “I’m sorry.”
Mack walks up the steps, stops, and looks at both of us, but goes to Lottie’s side and flops next to her. Not surprising.
“You have nothing to be sorry for.”
She hits her shoulder to mine. “We both know that’s not true.”
We sit in silence for a few minutes. It was selfish, dragging her into this. But I’m tired of pretending I’m fine. My head is a mess about how I live in this town I love with my parents always breathing down my neck. At some point, I probably need to sever ties to really live without being in their oppressive shadow. I’m either going to burn the bridge or let it rot beneath me.
She rocks her shoulder against mine again. “I thought you promised me a walk?”
I rise to my feet and hold out my hand to her. “You’re right. Care for a tour of my property?”
She slides her hand in mine, and Mack is quick to get to his feet, joining us as we descend the steps.
We fall in line, walking between my house and the barn, on a path worn into the grass. We head through the nestle of trees and make our way to the small pond, starting on the path around it. Lottie doesn’t try to fill the silence, and I appreciate her for it.
We walk long enough for my nerves to start crawling. Long enough for the guilt to push against my ribs. If I really want her, then I need to show her that she can open up to me about her trauma by showing her my own wounds.
“Did Holden ever tell you about our dad?” I ask.
I don’t miss her quick intake of breath, but Holden is my brother, and we can’t ignore the fact that once upon a time, she thought he was her forever.
“He said he could be difficult. Had high expectations.” She bends to the side and her fingers run down Mack’s back.
“My dad would go from zero to one hundred without any warning. And when he got upset, like really mad, he’d rage and say the worst things you can think of. Make you feel about a foot tall because he always knew exactly where the scars were, where to hit so it would hurt the most. It made you feel like you were worthless.”
