Page 37 of After the Rain
We hesitate only a second before we are all running towards the glowing orange sky. When we round the workshop, the smell of burning wood and the cloying smoke is almost too much to get through. But we carry on, and what we find breaks my heart a little. Ladybird, the boat we only launched this morning, the boat from which I showed Rain my favourite place in the world and where we had such an incredible afternoon together, has flames licking all the way up its mast from the cabin below. Nash reacts first, untying the mooring ropes, quickly helped by Archer and Cole. I tell Rain and Corey to stay back as I rush along the deck of Red Admiral, which is moored alongside Ladybird. The bow of the boat has not yet caught fire, but we need to get it away from the other boats, or else we could lose our entire fleet. I jump across the three-foot gap to land on Ladybird and hear Rain cry out in distress. Archer and Cole tell me to hurry the fuck up – don’t worry boys, I’m not fucking hanging around. I pull out my keys from my pocket, which have my dad’s old Swiss army knife attached to the keyring. I open it up and make quick work of cutting through the rope for the mud weight, securing the front of the boat in place.
As soon as the rope breaks, I jump back overto Red Admiral and lean away from the heat. Nash is standing on Cabbage White, which is moored up on the other side using his feet, as I am, to guide the burning boat forwards into the river, while Cole and Archer push it from the stern. They grab the quant poles from the tops of the other boats and use them to push the boat farther out.
From there, we can do nothing but watch it burn.
Only, that’s not good enough for Corey and Rain. They push past me and Nash on our respective boats, each armed with one of the water hoses we use to refill the water tanks of the boats before they go out on hire. I try to grab Rain back, but he shrugs me off without a word and points the hose towards the floating inferno. They pull the triggers simultaneously and soak the back of the boat. The flames that were trying to catch the stern of Ladybird alight dissipate quickly, and in horror, I watch as Rain and Corey both leap onto the back of the burning boat, still spraying their hoses into the flames.
I’ve had panic attacks over some seemingly stupid shit in my life, but watching the love of my life stand on a burning boat trying desperately to save it? Weirdly, the panic is nowhere to be found. I think I’m in shock at the events we are facing, but watching Rain and Corey’s silhouettesfade as the light of the flames is extinguished, and witnessing at this close a distance how they are engulfed in a cloud of acrid smoke, I can think nothing but how incredibly brave and strong both these men are. It seems Nash doesn’t have the same sense of awe, as when I look over at him, his jaw is tight, and he looks furious.Jesus Christ,I think to myself.Corey awoke the beast.
Twenty-Seven
Rain
Six hours after we managed to put the fire out, Aidan and I are finally crawling into bed. I’m hungover before I’ve even been to sleep. There’s nothing like a crisis to sober you up, quick smart. It’s just a shame that crisis-related sobriety doesn’t negate the hangover. I’m also exhausted, my chest is tight from inhaling the smoke, my eyes sting despite the long shower we took, and overall, I just feel fucking wrung out.
When I came out of my panic-induced hero moment and returned to the dock with Corey, Aidan very quickly wrapped me in his arms and kissed me while simultaneously telling me what a fucking idiot I am. I heard Nash giving Corey pretty much the same conversation, although I would have expected Corey to bite back a lot more than he did. He looked at the floor and mumbled in agreement with Nash, which was, quite frankly, fucking weird to see. But then,knowing what I know about the two of them, kind of makes sense.
Archer was already on the phone to their parents while Cole called the police and fire brigade. Before long, the cavalry arrived in force, with the exception of Sam. Although he did send Aidan a text to say he would come if he was needed. Aidan told him to stay at home. Wren, Chris, and Poppy turned up at the same time as the fire engine, ambulance, and police car, bringing a selection of milkshakes and sandwiches. Fuck, a chocolate milkshake has never tasted so fucking good as it did at that moment when my throat was red raw from the heat and smoke.
We had to wait while the fire investigators, well, investigated. We were able to wait inside the house, thank God, since it was freezing, and poor Pax was going apeshit at the commotion. He took a good while to calm down, only managing it when Aidan wrapped him up in my favourite blanket and laid him down in his lap. I cuddled up at Aidan’s side and stroked Pax’s ears as we waited for his shaking body to calm before he fell into a deep sleep.
The investigators had said that they still had to write up their official report, but that they had found clear evidence of accelerants and a couple of Zippo lighters in the boat’s cabin. So then, wehad to go through the whole police questioning of where we had been, what we had been doing, and whether there were any enemies of Aidan and his brothers. It was at that point that Nash had chimed in to say that we couldn’t rule out either my or Corey’s exes, or both, since they were brothers. That comment had earned Nash a sideways glare from Corey, but in truth, I knew we had to raise it. Because fuck! It was the only thing that made sense. Not only had I been tagged in that fucking photo on Instagram, which was probably where they had spotted my location, but they had means, motive, and opportunity to do this. I felt awful. If I hadn’t turned up here, this would never have happened.
I only managed to vocalise that once, though, before every single member of the Foster family and associated friends had loudly shot me down, assuring me that I had no responsibility in the actions of someone else. The police had to be informed about the history, but both Corey and I had declined to officially pursue charges for our treatment, as we both just wanted to move on. But Aidan and his brothers were adamant that when they found out for sure who had set Ladybird on fire, they would be prosecuting to the fullest extent of the law.
I can’t help but feel a bit anxious – OK, a lot anxious – about the prospect of at some pointhaving to deal with Dan again. I had hoped to just get away and let him get on with his life while I got on with mine. I should have known, really, that abusers never let things go that easily. Because it’s not really about the other person, is it? It’s about control. And I took his control away when I left. A narcissist with no power over another to inflate his own ego is like a firework without a stake securing it to the ground – completely unpredictable, dangerous, and with no clear idea in which direction it will explode.
Aidan wraps me in his arms and murmurs soft words to me to try and get my mind to stop racing. We’ve been lying here for about fifteen minutes at this point, and I haven’t said a word. I’ve just been staring into space, mindlessly playing with his chest hair. He puts a finger under my chin and brings my face up to his.
“Hi.”
“Hi,” I say in reply, my voice not even sounding like my own.
“Please, baby, don’t ever do something like that again.” I frown in confusion.
“What? Play with your chest hair?” He smiles at me indulgently, knowing full well that I’m trying to avoid this conversation.
“No, not that. That, you can do anytime. I meant, please don’t fucking walk into a fireto save a material possession. If you had… if anything… fuck!” Tears spill from his eyes, and I gasp in horror. Not Aidan. Not my beautiful man.
“Aidan!” I cry in a whispered voice as I crawl up his body and lie on top of him, gripping his face tight in my hands as I kiss his tears away, but they just fall harder. “Baby no. I was fine. The fire wasn’t too bad. I mean, it was bad, but it was safe to do what we did. I promise you. I wasn’t being thoughtless and careless. And Ladybird isn’t just a material possession. She’s your and your brothers’ hard work, creativity, and incredible skill. She’s our first time sailing together, and the first time I saw a heron, and the first time I knew what peace was. She’s more than a material possession, love. She’s special. And now” –thank fuck! –“she can be repaired and restored rather than completely destroyed and needing to be dredged from the bottom of the river.”
Aidan pulls me down to him in a fierce hug, and I hug him back as tightly as I can. He needs to know I’m here. I’m OK. I am safe. A little hoarse and wheezy, but safe. He has done such an amazing job of containing his anxiety tonight. I know it will hit him at some point, but for now, he’s done so well to just get through this shitty evening. It’s typical that after such a fantastic night celebrating Christmas in the pub, despite the weird Wren and Sam situation, wecame home to this disaster. The fireman in charge did say that he didn’t believe the fire had been burning long, as once the accelerant had burned away, the actual fire damage to the wooden boat was quite surface-level. None of the main structure of the boat had been damaged. But that just meant that the fire had been set intentionally for us to find it. Which meant that whoever had done it was waiting for us to leave the pub so they could make sure it was timed well.
I think we all suspect it was Dan and Dom, and the prospect of those two being here somewhere is messing with my head a bit, but I can’t borrow trouble. Until I see them, I just have to get on with things. Like going shopping tomorrow – well, later today – for our contributions to Christmas lunch at Aidan’s parents’ house. Fuck, it’s going to be a long day. And with that cheery thought in my mind, still lying on top of Aidan, we both drift off into sleep.
Christmas with Aidan’s family is like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. Even when Mum was alive, we had very small celebrations, just the two of us. But boy, does Bev Foster know how to flex on Christmas Day. Everything we ate was homemade, from scratch, even the mincemeat in the mince pies has been soaking in rum – not brandy because rum tastes betterapparently – since October. October! She even made her own pastry. Even Mary Berry buys Jus-Rol. Aidan, Corey, and I brought braised red cabbage and sautéed Brussels sprouts with crispy pancetta. Everyone else brought their own dishes, and the turkey Bev served up must have been at least part ostrich, I swear.
We let our food digest with a highly competitive game of Monopoly, during which Corey proceeded to absolutely annihilate the competition. Archer and Cole were more than thrilled that someone was able to beat Nash, who is apparently usually the victor. I’m not sure why I wasn’t surprised at that, but witnessing Corey celebrate thrashing Nash at his own game by demurely looking at his hands and accepting Nash’s congratulations with a quiet ‘thank you’ has me more sure than ever that Corey has, in fact, been taken over by a cyborg or an alien.
When Bev brings out the turkey sandwiches and Bailey’s at around six o’clock, Nash stands and makes a toast.
“Merry Christmas, everyone, and a huge thank you to Mum and Dad for hosting. Thanks to everyone for the food and gifts, it’s been a really great day.”
His words feel very formal, and then he starts clearing his throat as though he’s nervous. I look behind me to Aidan, whose lap I’m sittingon, and he just shakes his head slightly with a confused expression. Everyone is listening to Nash with rapt attention, curious about what he wants to say.
“I, uhm, I have a little announcement. Well, I guess it’s quite a big announcement, really.” He clears his throat again. “You all know that when Shelley left, I was gutted, but it took me a bit of time to realise that I wasn’t gutted about Shelley herself leaving. In reality, I was gutted about the prospect of not being a dad.”
All eyes are on Nash now, and Aidan grips my hips tighter. I suspect he has an inkling as to what Nash might be about to say. I think Bev might too, as she’s sitting on the edge of her seat with shiny eyes.
