Page 92 of Skating the Blue Line
“Want to know why she owes me that said favor?” I ask her, trying my hardest not to get lost in her eyes.
Or worse yet, lean down and repeat my slip up from a few weeks ago and kiss her.
Fuck that kiss was good. So damn good, that I jerked off in the shower afterwards
A sweet giggle sings into my ear. “Sure.”
“The night of the ballet, Ms. Sour over there was supposed to be my date. She bailed on me right before I left the apartment. Looking at it now, I’m glad that she did, because then I wouldn’t have met you and we wouldn't be having a baby soon. But I didn’t know that then so I asked her for a future favor in return of not disowning her as a friend for ditching me.”
The look on Chloe’s face is priceless. “Seriously?”
I nod. “I’m perfectly fine with blaming her for that night if you are.”
When she laughs at my suggestion, I can’t help but smile at her.
For the next few minutes, I stand next to Chloe, not saying a word and get mesmerized by her hazel eyes, just like I’ve done a handful of times in the seven months that we have known each other.
Never will I tire of getting lost in them. No matter what our relationship status is.
“Thank you for doing this,” Chloe tells me as we hear the shutter of the camera go off
“You don’t have to thank me for anything.”
“But I do. I don’t know why, but yesterday I was feeling so self-conscious about the changes happening to my body that hit me hard. Who would have thought that I could cry over a pair of pants? My body is changing and I should have expected it. You went out of your way to make me feel beautiful today and for that I can’t thank you enough.”
I slide a hand off her bump, up until I’m cupping her cheek.
“Don’t just let yourself just feel it. You not only look beautiful today. you have looked so damn beautiful everyday since I met you. So fucking beautiful that I wanna do take every single picture that Eliana takes today and have them all framed so I can look at them whenever I want.”
A blush creeps up her cheeks at my words, but they are the truth.
“You know, you have to stop saying things like that,” she says, even though she leans into my touch.
“And why would I do that?”
“Because I’m gonna start to think that maybe we made the wrong decision in not jumping into anything.”
“No, we made the right decision,” I say because we did.
We weren’t in a place to jump into anything serious when she found that she was pregnant. We had a lot of things going on. Dance, hockey, the baby, finding common ground.
But I feel like things between us have changed since then. We’ve gotten to know each other, spent time together without the pressure of being perfect. We know how to work together, something that we definitely didn’t know how to do seven months ago. If we were to revisit the subject now, I feel like we would be able to make it work.
“But I will say this,” I continue. “Things change. We’ve changed and if that was something that you wanted to revisit, I'm game if you are.”
The blush that coated her cheeks a bit a go, now deepens and I can see it go down to her chest.
“You’re just saying that because I’m having your baby,” she says as if she is trying to convince herself of those words.
“I’m saying that because I’m attracted to the woman in front of me and my feelings for her have definitely grown in the last few months. Do I find it hot seeing your body change because of my baby inside of you? Of course I do. But my attraction to you has been present since the night we met. The baby has nothing to do with it.”
I’m laying everything out there. I don’t care anymore to hide what I feel for this woman. And I feel a lot.
These last few months have taught me so damn much about Chloe. So many things outside of what I was initially attracted to.
She’s kind and warm hearted. She’s exactly who I would choose to be by my side for as long as I live.
But if she wants to stay friends for all of our lives, then I would. For her.
